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I’m out walking my donkey but as soon as I get my ass back in I’ll call you back. Leave me a message.

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Here are four sample voice mail messages you can start using today to separate yourself from the other 95% of voice mails that get ignored, deleted and never returned.
2.) Добро пожаловать в «Вася Пупкин и Ко». К сожалению, вы звоните нам в не рабочее время. Вы можете связаться с нами с понедельника по пятницу с 8 утра до 6 вечера, и в субботу с 9 утра до 4 вечера. Пожалуйста, оставьте сообщение или отправьте нам письмо на электронный адрес: [email protected]. Мы свяжемся с вами как можно скорее – Спасибо. .

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Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions.
When asked to press a number, pause on the phone/mic icon and click a number under the DIAL PAD tab.

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3.( مرحبا بكم في .JohnDoe حاليا لا يمكننا الرد شخصيا على مكالمتكم، من الممكن أنكم تتصلون بنا خارج ساعات العمل. يرجى ترك رسالة لنا مع اسمكم ورقم هاتفكم - سوف نتصل بكم مجددا في أقرب وقت ممكن. شكرا لكم و الى اللقاء.
Do you have a landline at work? Make sure that all your phones, personal and business, have good clear, professional English voicemail greetings.

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10Hello, this is [your name]. I’m probably at home just avoiding someone I dislike. A funny way of telling someone you’re avoiding them without sounding offensive or having to pick their calls. Please speak very slowly, make it short, make it sweet, and I’ll deliver the message to them. Using other household appliances as stand-ins for the message center is cute and funny. This voicemail will warn callers not to bring drama, so you can save yourself the trouble of having to hear a message that was about to spoil your day.

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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you're in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there's a chance they won't appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead.

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    Hello, this is (name). I am sorry I can’t come to the phone right now. Leave your name, number, and a short message after the beep. Oh and please do wait by the phone till I call you back. Bye.
    Every system is different. Let us know what file format you require your recordings in and we'll deliver them ready for upload into your cloud or on-premise system.

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    Funny voicemail ideas could do that trick, won’t they? Whether it is for your home, office, or cell phone, set a good voicemail that will keep your callers laughing even after they’ve left you a message. Ideas for a Voicemail. These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing.

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    11.) Bienvenido/a a John Doe, lo sentimos pero está intentando contactar con nosotros fuera de nuestro horario de oficina o simplemente no podemos atenderle en este momento. Si desea dejarnos un mensaje, por favor, envíenos un correo electrónico a [email protected]. Le contactaremos lo antes posible. Para obtener más información sobre nosotros, por favor, consulte nuestra página web www.johndoe.de. Muchas gracias por su llamada.

    We look forward to discussing your recording needs. Please don't hesitate to reach out to us with any questions that you may have.
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    After all, a professional voicemail recording boosts your credibility, makes you seem more competent, and encourages whoever's listening to it to continue the relationship.

    e. Never Assume Anything: Phrases like “You Know What To Do,” “Sing Your Song at the Beep,” and others mentioned above are awful to leave in your greeting. For the sake of universality and comprehensiveness, NEVER assume the caller knows what to do. Lay it out clearly. f. Leave a Message: This phrase, by itself, will not do. It’s imperative for users to identify themselves in their greetings. Callers need to know they’ve reached the right person. g. Disregard Lethargy: If you’re not excited about your greeting, why would anyone else be? Never display a lack of enthusiasm in your greeting as it could turn callers off to both you and your business. h. Speak Clearly and Never Slur: Callers need to understand your every word; therefore, mumbling, slurring, and all other detractions of speech should never be recorded. d. Be Creative Without Sacrificing Quality: Callers know how voicemails work–i.e. leave a number, message, etc. While you want to be clear, it’s important not to be contrive or redundant with your message. Creativity can help users to differentiate themselves, as well as intrigue callers. While users should avoid the tropes of creativity listed above, it’s definitely good to think outside the box. That being said, scripting and practice can help users to experiment more with their greeting–ultimately allowing for more unique and creative approach. e. Speak With Diction: It’s important to present one’s self as an authority without alienating callers. As such, it’s crucial to articulate and speak with clear diction. “ if your voice recording has you stumbling over words and speaking haltingly, it does not convey confidence and competence,” states Ron Sellers of Grey Matter Research & Consulting. Remember, this greeting represents you; therefore, you want to appear collected and professional, as well as welcoming. To do this, one must carry themselves well through their recorded message. f. Account for Timeliness: Your message should be concise. No caller wants to be sitting through a rant/diatribe of redundant statements. Your greeting should flow without dragging. Inversely, one doesn’t want to be terse, either. Engage callers with a simplified approach laden with creativity. h. Account for Quality: Aside from speaking clearly, users want to eliminate any noise in the surrounding environment. The quality of the greeting is just as important as what’s being said in the greeting itself. As such, one doesn’t want to undermine a great message with poor quality. i. Courtesy, Tastefulness, & Tact: This is pretty self-explanatory and straight forward–NEVER be rude. Being light-hearted and humorous is very different from being obnoxious and/or abrasive. Again, these tools can be helpful if utilized properly, but not everyone perceives humor the same way. So play it safe. The last thing your voicemail greeting should do is offend a caller. k. Provide Options: if you’re part of a bigger company, it might be good to offer caller options. For example, allow a menu to defer callers to a colleague or co-worker in your absence. This can help show callers you care about their well being. Another option might be offering different modes of communication–i.e. email, fax, etc. In offering users diversity, contact may be much easier to maintain.
    Do you ever get those voicemails that sound completely unprofessional? There’s a long pause before the person starts talking, and even then it’s usually a questioning, “Hello?” They aren’t sure if they’ve reached a real person or a voicemail. Another pause, then a lengthy message that never gets to the point.

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The above section details types of phrasing to avoid; however, it doesn’t detail what users should NOT say on their greeting. Though this is a bit loaded, as there are hundreds of combinations of things one shouldn’t say, there are some key components users should ALWAYS avoid. a. Forget About Slang: You should strive to be as professional and welcoming as possible in your greeting. While this may steer you towards using slang, in an attempt to make callers comfortable, it’ll most likely work against you. As a professional, your demeanor, tone, and speech should be clear cut and well articulated. Using slang undercuts this and works against you. b. Don’t Even Think About Profanity: This is a no-brainer. Never, under any circumstances, curse in your greeting EVER! c. Keep Your Sentences Clean, Don’t Ramble: Introduce yourself and give your caller specific direction. Avoid long diatribes detailing tangent thoughts. Keep it simple and quick. d. Always Return Your Calls: It’s important for callers to feel they are valued. Nothing dissolves this quicker than a greeting that doesn’t stress this. For example, “I’ll call you when I can,” “If I don’t return your call, please call back”—these phrases are terrible and completely destroy any good will you may have with a caller.

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Or maybe you’ve heard the voicemails that seem to catch the caller entirely off guard. You can hear them chewing, taking a sip of water, or the classic, “Oh, um, hi.”

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3. Be authentic. Adding on to the previous tip, be different when leaving your voicemail. The idea is to show them that you actually know and care about what you’re calling about.Have intention in your call, and personalize your voicemail. Even over a voicemail, people can sense when someone is being fake.. You can hear a lot of advice being shared on being …

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