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I have a confession to make: I haven't recorded a new voicemail greeting in nearly a decade. Since then, I've (hopefully) become more articulate, poised, and self-assured. But hear my voicemail recording, and you'd think I was still new to the work world, a little unsure of myself — and probably not an authority.
If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service. .

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Hey, who’s this? I’d actually pick up, but my phone is staring at me. OMG! I just saw it wink!
A good way to do this is to maybe add, “Have a wonderful day” at the end of the greeting. It’s short, so it won’t contradict the first point, and it makes the message more personal.

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Friends and colleagues speak to each using first names only. So do people of authority. They do not call each other and leave voicemail messages asking for Mister, Miss, or Mrs. Therefore, when you call a person you want to do business with and you leave a voicemail message, refer to them by their first name only. Don't say mister, miss, or misses. Don't say their last name. Begin your voicemail message by saying only "hi/hello" followed by the person's first name. Or, you can even forget the "hi/hello" and just say the person's first name. That is how you show confidence and authority and separate yourself from weak salespeople.
Professional voicemail greetings & voicemail messagesProfessional Auto attendant greetingsProfessional IVR phone recordingProfessional voicemail marketingProfessional Messages on Hold

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1. Write a list of information you want to include in your voicemail greeting. Writing out a list of points to include may sound arduous, but when your voicemail could potentially be the first impression someone has of you, it’s best if it doesn’t come with a bunch of "Um, uh," noises and awkward pauses. You want your voicemail to contain some basic information in a polite manner that will help the caller know that it’s you, and information to leave so you can call back as soon as possible. Include your name (and the company if this is a business voicemail), a statement that lets the caller know you apologize for missing the call, and information you would like from the caller such as name, number, and a brief message concerning the purpose of the call.

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09Hey, I’m available right now but can’t find my phone. Kindly leave a message and I will call you back as soon as I get it. This cute message will help your callers know you aren’t close to your cell phone. They’ll be reassured that once you get their message, you’ll call them back.

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    Business voicemail greetings are likely to vary by company. Consider these specifics to create a professional voicemail greeting that works for your needs.

    Record Your Thoughts in Teams Personal and Group Chats To record a voice memo, hold down the microphone icon (Figure 1) and speak. Release the hold to stop the recording and then send it as you would a normal message. Teams Feature Storage Location Voicemail Messages Stored in users’ Outlook mailbox Meeting Recordings (1:1 and Group) Stored in the OneDrive account of the user who started the recording in a folder named Recordings
    Good day. You’ve reached the residence of the O’Meara family on 5th and Oak. We regret not being able to attend to your call. However, if you choose to, you may leave your contact information at the tone, and we shall be most happy to return your call as soon as we are able. Thank you for your call. Include the name of the individual, family or business State you are sorry you cannot get to the phone Ask them to leave their contact information behind Thank them for their call Informal Voicemail Greetings

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    Editor’s Note: The article is part of the blog series Grow Your Business brought to you by the marketing team at UniTel Voice, the virtual phone system priced and designed for startups and small business owners.

    I appreciate your efforts at customer service. My clients receive the same impression and think better of my company.
    16Hey, could you come up with some cute voicemail greetings, I’m out. Can you just leave your suggestion, after the tone? This voicemail engages your caller, challenging them to come up with funny voicemail messages, while they wait to leave their messages after the tone.

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    I am not in the office today; I may not be in tomorrow. I may be in to work sooner, if you gave me your car to borrow.

    10 Effective Debt Collection Call Script Samples. Here are ten debt collection call script samples (as per FDCPA guidelines) to help you strike a fruitful conversation with debtors. However, you can adjust these scripts as per your circumstances. Script 1 – Calling a customer who forgot to pay. You: Good Morning. My name is John, and I am a
    4. Humorous Voicemail Greetings. While straightforward is always the safe bet, certain entities can go to the humorous side of voicemail greetings. Before taking this route, consider the type of callers and the persona the recipient is trying to convey.

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    You have stated your calls-to-action. Now you have to make sure they know the process to follow. If you want your customers to leave their voicemail messages, you have to tell them from the start, “Kindly leave your name, purpose of your call, and how to contact you.”

    In the case that your business is closed due to an emergency, it's only worth it to go into detail if the problem is affecting everyone in the area. Otherwise, stick to your Company Wide Voicemail Greeting, but remove the stated hours and tell callers that you're currently closed. Thank you for calling Cutlass Technology. Our store is currently closed. Please leave your name and phone number so that someone from our team can follow up with you. For more information, please visit www.cutlasstechnology.com
    Because for many callers, this will be the first point of contact for your business, it’s important to set it up correctly — but how?

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The above greeting is a professional voicemail script used by many growing and established businesses. It delivers the message quickly and efficiently, without wasting the caller’s time. While many businesses can use this standard voicemail greeting, not everyone’s business wants to be the same as the others.

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If you're voicemail isn't offering the right information, you might lose a sale. 7 Things Real Estate Agents Need in a Voicemail Greeting. Your name. It seems obvious, but many people forget to include their name in a voicemail message.

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