Humor also leaves a lot of room for misinterpretation—which subsequently weakens sincerity and authority. A caller can be very turned off by merely misinterpreting your joke. Why take this risk? Additionally, this could even cause callers to question your character. Say, for example, the president of a company’s mobile phone voicemail greeting was funny. What’s to happen if the caller didn’t like or get the joke? What if they found it offensive? Another scenario is that a caller is reaching out to you for the first time—i.e. they have no idea regarding your personality. What next? The point is, with this type of greeting, humor is bound to be more divisive so just avoid it altogether. c. Poorly Pacing Your Message and Bad Time Management: Don’t speed through your message. Speak clearly so callers know what to include in their message and when to leave the message. At the same time, don’t drag your message out. No one wants to sit through a diatribe. Just get to the point clearly.
3. Voicemail Greetings For Business. You’ve reached (insert company name.) All of our team members are busy at the moment, but someone will return your call within (insert timeframe) if you’ll be so kind as to leave your name, number, and a brief message.

e. Never Assume Anything: Phrases like “You Know What To Do,” “Sing Your Song at the Beep,” and others mentioned above are awful to leave in your greeting. For the sake of universality and comprehensiveness, NEVER assume the caller knows what to do. Lay it out clearly. f. Leave a Message: This phrase, by itself, will not do. It’s imperative for users to identify themselves in their greetings. Callers need to know they’ve reached the right person. g. Disregard Lethargy: If you’re not excited about your greeting, why would anyone else be? Never display a lack of enthusiasm in your greeting as it could turn callers off to both you and your business. h. Speak Clearly and Never Slur: Callers need to understand your every word; therefore, mumbling, slurring, and all other detractions of speech should never be recorded. d. Be Creative Without Sacrificing Quality: Callers know how voicemails work–i.e. leave a number, message, etc. While you want to be clear, it’s important not to be contrive or redundant with your message. Creativity can help users to differentiate themselves, as well as intrigue callers. While users should avoid the tropes of creativity listed above, it’s definitely good to think outside the box. That being said, scripting and practice can help users to experiment more with their greeting–ultimately allowing for more unique and creative approach. e. Speak With Diction: It’s important to present one’s self as an authority without alienating callers. As such, it’s crucial to articulate and speak with clear diction. “ if your voice recording has you stumbling over words and speaking haltingly, it does not convey confidence and competence,” states Ron Sellers of Grey Matter Research & Consulting. Remember, this greeting represents you; therefore, you want to appear collected and professional, as well as welcoming. To do this, one must carry themselves well through their recorded message. f. Account for Timeliness: Your message should be concise. No caller wants to be sitting through a rant/diatribe of redundant statements. Your greeting should flow without dragging. Inversely, one doesn’t want to be terse, either. Engage callers with a simplified approach laden with creativity. h. Account for Quality: Aside from speaking clearly, users want to eliminate any noise in the surrounding environment. The quality of the greeting is just as important as what’s being said in the greeting itself. As such, one doesn’t want to undermine a great message with poor quality. i. Courtesy, Tastefulness, & Tact: This is pretty self-explanatory and straight forward–NEVER be rude. Being light-hearted and humorous is very different from being obnoxious and/or abrasive. Again, these tools can be helpful if utilized properly, but not everyone perceives humor the same way. So play it safe. The last thing your voicemail greeting should do is offend a caller. k. Provide Options: if you’re part of a bigger company, it might be good to offer caller options. For example, allow a menu to defer callers to a colleague or co-worker in your absence. This can help show callers you care about their well being. Another option might be offering different modes of communication–i.e. email, fax, etc. In offering users diversity, contact may be much easier to maintain.
“Hello! You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name], [your job title]. I’m currently either away from my desk or on the other line. Please leave your name, telephone number, and a short message after the beep, and I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I’m available.”