I want to be clear that I don’t think OOO responders are the solution to the larger problems of worker inequality or the broad American cultural attitudes that celebrate and encourage overwork. That would be silly. The big remedies for what ails modern work will likely require workers organizing and employers recognizing and granting protections. Large companies will have to stop prioritizing shareholder at the expense of their workers. I’m aware how unlikely this feels in practice and how a thoughtful auto reply email feels like applying a band-aid on a gunshot wound. I get it.
The use of humans is weirdly condescending to me, like people who say ‘doggo’ sincerely. It seems incredibly off at work.

I work for a hospital, in a role unrelated to patient care. My first out of the office message was just my name and department. After a series of increasingly plaintive messages one evening, I added, “If you are calling about patient care, you have the wrong number.”
I will find a few moments of holiday bliss once they watch Elf for the seventh time this month. I’ll seize the quiet to check my email once a day. I will only respond to urgent matters but will reply to all emails upon my return.