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“To the Robotics Corp office, this mail is to inform all the staff and employees that the office will be closed for a week on the occasion of Durga Puja. Through this mail also, I send holiday wishes for all the employees on a superb recreational holiday period. Have a happy holiday.”
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I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s had experiences in the past with people not getting an immediate answer then upping the urgency–we’ve had letters about such coworkers here. There’s an email, then a followup email, then a chat message, then a phone call, then they walk over, all within ten minutes of the initial email.
I’ll be 1 percent connected while on vacation so I’m not 100 percent panicked on return. Thank you for emailing me.
2.) Добро пожаловать в «Вася Пупкин и Ко». После праздников наш обслуживающий персонал будет снова доступен для вас с понедельника, с 4.7.2016. Доставка заказов начнется снова с 01.11.2016. В то же время вы можете отправить свой запрос на нашу электронную почту [email protected] или обратиться через нашу контактную форму. Огромное спасибо!
4.) Benvenuti alla John Doe Solutions. A causa di un evento interno, il nostro servizio di segreteria non è disponibile oggi. Potete lasciare un messaggio. Saremo nuovamente al vostro servizio lunedì. Ringraziamo per la vostra comprensione.
Same, I think it’s patronizing to talk people through their options as if they can’t make a decent choice without having their hand held every step of the way. There are plenty of people who can’t, of course, but I don’t think a long, verbose message is necessarily going to help.
21. "Hello, you've reached [your name, the office of X company]. The team is currently out of the office, but we'll be back on [date] stuffed with good food and eager to speak with you. Leave your name, number, and — if you're so inclined — your favorite [holiday dish, Thanksgiving tradition, etc.]"
1.) Bem-vindo a John Doe. Nosso atendimento direto não funciona durante o feriado. Nosso horário de funcionamento pode ser encontrado no nosso site www.joendoe.de - Obrigado por sua confiança. Desejamos a você e seus entes queridos boas festas e um feliz ano novo.
A former coworker used to always include a kitten picture when she submitted invoices.
We promise the world will not end while our offices are closed and encourage you cherish this time with your families and friends!
7.) Benvenuti all’ufficio legale John Doe. Ci scusiamo, ma al momento non possiamo rispondere personalmente alla vostra chiamata, perché state chiamando durante le nostre vacanze annuali. Non esitate a inviarci una e-mail a: [email protected] – Vi contatteremo al più presto possibile al nostro ritorno. Per casi urgenti, vi preghiamo di contattare i nostri responsabili d’ufficio. Potete trovarli sul nostro sito web: www.lawoffice-johndoe.de. Grazie per la vostra chiamata – Arrivederci.
Also, you need to know your audience if you are going to go eccentric. Alison mentions that this message is fine in their culture, but it wouldn’t npbe appropriate for my somewhat formal field. And even if your workplace in general is casual, you might be contacted by someone outside. (In a tiny provincial courthouse I served in the past, there is a story going around that in the 80s a junior but elderly clerk used to address phone callers as hun and sweetheart and generally speak very informally. Most people thought it was funny, and then the President of Supreme Court called and… he didn’t).
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I think the problem is that “at your earliest convenience” is a formulaic convention that uses explicit, almost exaggerated politeness to basically issue a stern direction, meaning “as soon as you possibly can”. When you turn it into “at my earliest convenience” it’s unclear if you mean “whenever it’s convenient for me to get to it” (what the words say) or “as soon as I possibly can” (what the meaning of the formulaic original is). Or else it sounds like you didn’t quite understand how “at your earliest convenience” works.
Regardless of my general health and hygiene over the silly season, I’ll be back in the office on January 2. 15. “Thank you for your consideration during this festive or not-festive time.”