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Our auto-replies to outside people are two or three paragraphs long though, which feels ridiculous but is actually necessary.

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I’m with you, honestly! When the end was “she’s So great” and not “she’s so [sime negative adjective]” I was actually surprised. I thought it was annoying and condescending and all around extra. But I guess I see why some people (including the ooo boss) would think it’s funny.
I like that you can sometimes tell the team dynamics by the OOO. In my experience I’ve seen that: – “If you need something, contact a member of my team” = I trust my crew and probably would prefer you email them all the time, TBH. – “If you need something, contact my boss” = I don’t trust my team and think my work is #higherlevel, OR my boss is a micromanager. – “If you need something, text me” = I hate my boss and don’t trust them to handle my work OR I think I’m very important and the company can’t function without me. .

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Thanks so much for your email. I took today off to [rest/relax/travel/spend time with family]. In an effort to come back fully recharged, I won’t be spending today with my phone attached to my hand. (Scary, I know.) Don’t worry, though, because I will be checking in every so often and responding to anything urgent.
3. Out of Office Template #3 For the Person Who Keeps Things Festive. Season’s greetings! It’s my favorite time of year, which means I’m currently away from my inbox chugging mugs of cocoa, stuffing my face with cookies, and attempting to fulfill my life-long goal of memorizing every single line of [your favorite holiday movie].

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For those new to the business world, your out-of-office message is the most common form of automation related to email. Once activated, it sends out a predetermined email message to anyone who emails you while you’re out, telling recipients exactly what they need to know.
Perhaps I’m you guys’ worst nightmare, but for the past couple of years I’ve been writing haikus for my OOO, which give a flavour of what I’m out doing. A couple of examples:

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Dear Customer, Our office will be closed from [date] until [date] and close again for December 31 and January 1 to welcome the New Year. We wish you the warmest holiday. Regards. [Company name] ——. Dear Customer, Please note that on [day], [date], is [holiday name]. The store will be closed all day and will open again at [time] on [Day].

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I have gotten weird pushback on this that people are offended that I would say I am out for religious observance, as if it somehow implies that my reason for being out of the office is more important (or inviolable) than theirs. I don’t even know what to do with that.

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    This is typically what I do. People don’t need to know where you are or what you’re doing. It’s really none of their business. They just need to know how long you’ll be out, that you won’t be checking email or vm while you’re gone, and who to contact instead.

    I’ll be enjoying this year’s holiday season from [DATE] until [DATE]. For general inquiries about [DEPARTMENT/ROLE], please email [CONTACT NAME]. If this isn’t time sensitive, feel free to resend this email in [MONTH] once I’m regularly checking emails again. All the best.
    Hi there. I’m out of the office until Monday, 14 August, with limited access to email.

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    As for this one I think it’s fine for internal particularly if someone can “read it in her voice” and knows she’s quirky but I’d probably just do a short one for external (or none? because I’ve heard there is some kind of security risk with them?)

    Protocol for when you should use an out-of-office message will vary by job and industry, but generally, you should set an OOO message when you’ll be out for two or more days.
    There’s just one problem with this approach: you’ve now obligated yourself to regularly check your email the whole time you’re out.

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    Something about it gets my goat up! Like she’s working and emailing me about things she wants me to work on, but her OOO is telling me to buzz off coz she’s too busy to get to my emails. Also she still has it set up and we’ve been in lockdown for over a week. How long does she intend to have her OOO triaging everything and making excuses for delays? We all know there’s a lockdown, that’s why everyone is scrambling for their events to be rescheduled – it just comes across as very self-important at a time where everyone is under stress. No one else in the organisation has this so it seems very bizarre to have an OOO while still working!

    This is one reason I rarely give a contact person. My company is terrible at communication, and not only could you easily be sent on a OOO chain, you could also be emailing someone who is out who didn’t even use OOO.
    Skip the "Greetings," "Salutations," "Dear sir/madam." These are far too stuffy and robotic. Instead, start off your response with a simple "Hi" or Hello."

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    Doesn’t work when phone is off or out of range, does it? I’m a small business owner but I am often driving in out of range areas and will be traveling for a week with no signal most of the time. Considering leaving my phone plugged in at home just so it can send the auto replies. Still no fix though for the hours spent outside sms land every week.

    Yes – it’s become a stock phrase that people think sounds polite but they’re not grasping the nuance of it.
    I’ve had several co-workers over the years use “at my earliest convenience” and it’s always rubbed me the wrong way. It just sounds kind of dismissive like, “I don’t care when you need it, I’ll get to it when I get to it.”

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By the way, [Name], our [Title], will be giving a speech sharing unique experience in [field]. I think you’ll enjoy it.

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There is any number of valid reasons why you might skip on your email inbox for a while. You can be on vacation, feel sick or take a few days off to recharge.

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Thank you for your email! I am on vacation. Vacations are not for checking email, so I won’t be doing that. Fortunately, we rarely encounter life and death situations in the world of [INDUSTRY TYPE], and aren’t we all glad for that? If you think I’m checking email because you just received an email from me, that is only because I figured out the pixies that send emails on a schedule. Really, I’m not checking email.

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It’s really only meant as a courtesy but if your culture is different I can see where it’s eye-roll y.

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