The worst one I ever received was from a coworker (senior to me, but not my manager) many years ago. I’ll paraphrase it as my memory isn’t great:
Since holidays occur throughout the year, there is no one ideal time to send a message. For the winter holidays, we recommending sending your well wishes early in December. In general, if you can send your message before people get busy with the holiday, then it will have a larger impact.
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That 15minute breaktime message screams “past experience with a toxic company” to me.
Wow, it’s a bloody snooze fest over here! Just kidding, this option is the most appropriate for 95% of business out-of-office responses. It’s simple, no-nonsense, and tells people all they need to know.
In case of pressing issues that need urgent attention, feel free to reach out to [CO-WORKER NAME]. Give them a call on [PHONE NUMBER] or send a message to [CO-WORKER EMAIL].
My pet peeves are too much personal information (no need to tell me your cousin had a hysterectomy) and the ones that are carbon dated, e.g. from 2018.
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Our auto-replies to outside people are two or three paragraphs long though, which feels ridiculous but is actually necessary.
I say I’m off-duty, or in non-working status, but I come from a DOD background. I no longer like to say out of the office. Unavailable is good too.
To keep up to date with what’s happening at [Company], follow us on Facebook/ Twitter/ LinkedIn/ Instagram (You’ll like our posts on Facebook.)
AH #2 – Closed with Voicemail. Thank you for calling Business Name. We are currently closed for the Christmas Break and will be reopening for business as usual on Time and Date. If you would like to leave a message, please do so after the tone including your Name and a Contact number and we will be in touch when we reopen.
The answer lies in writing an effective out-of-office message to help reduce the interruptions. “Let key people know you’ll be gone before you leave,” says Ivan Misner, founder of the global business network BNI and author of Who’s In Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life. “That will help reduce your email. Then craft an out-of-office message for everyone else.”
I’ll add “with limited access to email and voicemail” if I’m out because of work-related stuff (back when we used to have offsite meetings!), and “with no access to email and voicemail” if I’m truly on PTO.
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I dunno – I think it says more about the writer than the culture. I worked in tech where there were always a handful of people who would do stuff like this, but most people would keep it basic. I just think some people love putting funky or gimmicky twists on rote stuff.