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It definitely sounds like something my boss would write and I laughed at it. In our work, everyone thinks that they’re a special emergency all the time. Stopping to think “if I don’t have this in the next two days what will the actual consequences be” is a thing that should happen more but doesn’t.

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Select Voicemail at the bottom of the screen. Select Personal at the top. Select the voicemail you want to listen to. Click on the play icon to listen to the message. Listen on your Weave Phone. Dial 9001 from your Weave phone. It will inform you of any new voicemails and play them. Listen on your Mobile App.
COMPLETELY agree. Every time I see an OOO for a two-hour doctor’s appointment I have to fight the urge to reply with “How much are you paid?” because I know there is no scenario in which I would have to explain myself if I don’t answer an email for a few hours and if you are that important you better make a LOT more than I do. .

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Happy Holidays is used only around Christmas in the USA. Traditionally, it was meant to include both Christmas and New Year's Day. We don't usually say "Happy Holiday" at other times, although there's nothing wrong with saying it.
15. "This is Bond. James Bond. Okay, it's really [your last name]. [Your first name] [your last name]. I'll get back to you as soon as I'm done helping M16 save the world — which will probably be tomorrow at the latest. Have a good day."

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It’s a reminder to you that you should be disconnecting, Smith says, whether it’s to recharge during your staycation or to focus on a family emergency. And it can give you peace of mind to know you’ve communicated what’s needed for things to continue running smoothly in your absence.
Very true, if the options came in reverse order (or maybe emergency first followed by not-urgent followed by urgent) that would be a little better.

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I think this makes a lot of sense for a 2-3 month absence, when there wouldn’t be much point in reading and responding to things when you get back. Questions will have been answered and issues resolved by different means.

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My old job was like that! It was so, so annoying. I understood requiring us to update our voicemails if we were out of the office that day, but it was just a waste of a few minutes every single morning.

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    My team had a standard Christmas OOO, because we had international clients who needed reminding that basically the entire country is OOO 25th-1st. The message itself was fairly boring, but the template had “xxxx” as a placeholder for your signoff, and every single year someone would say “I’m not sure I’m comfortable giving our clients that many kisses”

    I have a colleague who usually does different ones for internal and external: internal will be “I’m currently in the pouring rain in a tent in the Cotswolds. I get back (hopefully without trenchfoot!) on Monday Date. Whilst I’m getting soggy please contact Email Address.” and external is just “I’m on annual leave between X and Y and will not be accessing my email. Please contact Email Address if you need assistance during this time.” We all really like their internal ones.
    Here are four tips to help you create an effective after-hours voicemail greeting: 1. State your business name and hours of operation upfront. The first thing your callers should hear is the name of your business or organization. If they are calling when you are closed you should also be sure to let them know your standard business hours.

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    Sometimes people will think it’s okay to ask a quick question while you’re out of the office. Avoid the interruption by including at least one person who can answer questions in your absence.

    Whether your schedule has changed because you’re temporarily down to part-time or because you’re trying to fit work in around taking care of your children, you can use your OOO message to communicate and set expectations. You might write:
    I’ve run into the “no voicemail” thing at a few businesses where phone was the main mode of contact too, and it was hugely frustrating. You call your doctor to ask about, say, a billing issue, and it turns out they’re closed, but then it just says the office hours and “goodbye *click*”. Seriously? Sorry, /end rant.

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    She, if I recall, had a few comments from people when she got back regarding her words (she was on annual leave on holiday, it wasn’t a family emergency or anything that might excuse the tone). It rubbed quite a few people up the wrong way (most of them parents themselves!). Don’t recall more of an outcome though, I wasn’t at that firm long.

    Most awkward/painful one I ever saw was a former co-worker. ~10 years ago when he left on paternity leave, he said as much in his out of office. The baby was stillborn. It stayed up for the month or so until he returned. Those of us in the same office of course knew the situation, but we regularly communicated directly with multiple offices in different states and countries. The very first time I saw it I was overcome with dread about how many congratulations he would receive and have to tell the story to. I was much younger and afraid to rock the boat then, but I think now I would push his manager and IT to use their ability to access his account and change it.
    Perhaps I’m you guys’ worst nightmare, but for the past couple of years I’ve been writing haikus for my OOO, which give a flavour of what I’m out doing. A couple of examples:

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    Thank you for your email. Your message is important to (Us/Me) and (I/We) will respond as soon as possible.

    I am in London May 29th - June 4th, so email replies may be tardy due to the curvature of the earth and the sun… and you know… science and stuff.
    Businesses can create offline messages in REVE Chat to keep their customers informed about their business hours and guide them towards getting a faster response.

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I’ll be back at my desk on [date] and will respond to your message immediately. In case you need urgent assistance, please forward an email to [contact name] at [contact email] so that Santa’s little helpers at our shop may look into it.

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Such emails can range from strictly professional and formal to funny, depending on the occasion. You can use those messages in a way that would drive traffic to your website or serve as an instrument to form a stronger bond with your customers.

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Further, given how poorly humor — especially sarcastic or snarky, even if mild — translates in text, you're running a moderate risk of pissing someone off through no fault of their own, for no reason other than to indulge yourself.

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If you want to make sure your message gets a response ASAP when I return, please send it on July 18th. I recommend using one of our sales automation tools to schedule it now, while you’re thinking about it. 5. “I know I’m supposed to say that I’ll have limited access to email, but...”

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