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I’ve started going really, really simple on OOO messages – literally just “I’ll be out of the office until ___, please contact ___ for questions about ____”

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That’s the simple structure of a voicemail greeting. Overall, your greeting should be professional, but the wording can vary depending on the situation. Check out a sample below.
2) Hi. I’m thinking about what you’ve just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response. .

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Like the previous examples, the message doesn’t have to be lengthy – you just need to let people know the details, and who they should be contacting in your absence.
16) I am currently out of the office and probably out-of-my-mind drunk. Enjoy your workweek.

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Oh heavens no. All I ask of an out of office is that it tells me when the person will be back (if known) and who I can contact in the interim.
On the iPhone, you have the option to activate DND mode in different ways. The “Automatic Mode” and “When Connected to Car Bluetooth” will take care of while driving.

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If you’re reading this, the train wasn’t able to push the DeLorean up to 88 miles per hour, and I’m stuck in 1885. I won’t be able to respond to emails until exactly 8:30 a.m. EST on [DAY OF WEEK], [DATE]. If there’s an emergency, good luck. Try to get ahold of Doc.

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I received one from a coworker in middle management that said something to the effect of “I’m working on a large-scale project and will be unable to answer email until X date. Please contact [direct report’s email] with any questions.” This went on for well over a month.

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    Agreed. Every time you are in a meeting is overkill. For some people they are never not in meetings.

    We’ve certainly come a long way since the honeymoon days of You’ve Got Mail, the 1998 Meg Ryan romcom in which each new electronic missive set Tom Hanks’ heart fluttering (and vice versa). These days, in tech circles, you’ll hear tales of folk who’ve set their email servers up to automatically delete unread emails after a week – before going on holiday for a full fortnight. Others have reduced the OOO to a single word in the subject line: “Nope.”
    Yupp! At this particular place we had a client who could not get a hold of someone. They made a huge stink about it and this became company policy. We also had to change our VM every night. We also had to reply to any emails we received within 4 hours. Even if we didn’t have an answer.

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    Dear Customer, Thank you for your email Inquiry, Our office closed is closed celebrating [HOLIDAY]. We will not be able to respond to your email until [date]. Apologize for the delay. We wish you a wonderful holiday season. Best regards.

    I think in an industry/company culture where that kind of responsiveness is expected/normal, that makes a lot of sense!
    4.) Bienvenido/a a soluciones John Doe. Por motivos de organización interna nuestro equipo no se encuentra disponible hoy. Si lo desea, puede dejarnos un mensaje. Volveremos a atenderle el lunes. Gracias por su comprensión.

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    Not a translator, but I do work in a field where bilingual offices are pretty common, and I have not done my OOO in our second language–mostly because it is a non-Latin alphabet, and I do not have the secondary keyboard installed. I’m pretty sure my voicemail is in both languages, though.

    Q. I work on Main Campus and don't have essential business to conduct during the winter break closure; however, I want to catch up on work before spring semester. May I work on campus?
    Thanks for the email!. I’m currently out of my office and will be back at 11th of May. I will have very limited or no access to my email.

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    As a result, our text-based work communication has morphed into a series of strange, stilted, passive aggressive, and performatively upbeat exchanges. Much of the actual text of work email exchanges is ornamental filler language filled with exclamation points and phrases like “just looping back on this” that mask burnout, frustrated obligation, and sometimes outright contempt (the absolute best example of this is a wonderful 2015 post titled, “Just Checking In,” where writers Virginia Heffernan and Paul Ford write fake emails in this vein to see who can cause the other the most panic).

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Thank you for calling [Company Name]. Our offices are currently closed for the day. Standard office hours are Monday to Friday, 8 AM to 8 PM Eastern Time. Did you know that you can check your account status with us 24 hours a day / 7 days a week by visiting [account login webpage]? Here you can view information about your account, as well as answers to general questions you may have. Otherwise, please call back during standard office hours, and we will be happy to assist you. To repeat this message, press the # key. Holiday Greetings

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A literary agent I follow told the story of a long argument her autoreply had with a would-be author. She’d set up the outbound email while out of town and apparently an author who queried her with his book took offense to it. He replied back in frustration that he didn’t get a personal response. Her autoreply sent back another automated message, which he then in increasing anger kept responding to.

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Leave some lights on for safety, but turn off any unnecessary ones before leaving. Test that all main doors are locked, as well as any server or file rooms holding sensitive equipment or information.

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I usually go with “Hickory, dickory, dock, I’m off the clock. When the clock strikes Tuesday, I’ll be back.”

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