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I should note that our voicemail system has a pretty straightforward feature to put an end date on an out-of-office voicemail message. I am baffled why this person does not use the feature.

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You are under no obligation to share the reason for your absence. Even if you’re on parental leave, “on leave” or “out of the office” is sufficient. Unfortunately, discrimination against pregnant people and parents happens, and if you don’t want to disclose that you’re on parental leave, you don’t have to.
So, take a lesson from @courtwhip, editor at PEDESTRIAN.TV, who wrote the above hilarious out-of-office email, fully stocked with mentions of the best movies from the 1990s. (By the way, “Splinter” is from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and as we all know, he loves pizza.) .

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I appreciate your email. Currently, I am out of the office but will return after (Date of Return). My access to email will be limited during this period of time.
I am currently on annual leave and I return to the office on Monday 21st September. I will reply to your email as soon as possible.

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I will surely respond to your email when I’m back in the office. But, if this requires an immediate response, please resend any messages that require my immediate attention with a subject line of “URGENT: [Original Subject]”.
We have some field staff who have out of office replies set up for when they do fieldwork. On one hand it’s nice I guess, but on the other hand, they aren’t dealing with urgent matters only they can handle (they don’t manage projects or deal with clients), so it seems a bit unnecessary? No one has been disciplined for not responding to an email the same day. But maybe I’m just a crabby Gen-Xer, and a client can stand to wait a few hours or until the next day to get an answer from me.

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I’ll be 1 percent connected while on vacation so I’m not 100 percent panicked on return. Thank you for emailing me.

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Setting up an effective out-of-office autoresponder may seem to be a simple task. However, there is nothing worse than receiving an automated response that is not clear or useful. You want your “out of office” message to provide useful information and clarify why you are not available now. You certainly want to avoid any confusion or frustration.

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    The problem was that this had to be done on deadline and people wanted me to do other things for them that weren’t time sensitive. So I put up an internal-only out of office that basically said “hey sorry I’m working on project X and we have a tight deadline. If this isn’t urgent I’ll get back to you next week. If it is urgent, let me know!”
    Q. Will students who want to enroll or receive information from various departments be able to talk with someone during winter break?

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    I try to substitute “parental leave” for “maternity leave” whenever possible. Trying to normalize it as a benefit to all employees (at my company) rather than a special lady-vacation.

    I agree! I’m in HR and all I can think of when I see funny OOO’s from people is, “How big of an a$$ are you going to feel when someone emails you about needing time off for a funeral and they get this nonsense back?”
    As a person who hates voicemail, I applaud this. Send me an email. Give me a paper trail.

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    Website: https://futureofworking.com/11-office-closed-due-to-inclement-weather-messages/

    My workplace is super strict about out of office replies. We have 3 scripts we are allowed to use; and we are only allowed to change our name, job title, and return to office date. If you veer off script, management will have IT turn off your out of office as it does not comply with their standards. They are also super strict with messages on our voicemails, again with the option of using 2 scripts and changing your name, job title, and return to office date.
    Otherwise, all hands will be back on deck upon my return on Thursday 5th September and I will reply to your email at the earliest convenience. The single biggest day of the year for calling in sick tends to fall during the festive period; more people were too ill to work on Monday 10 December than any other day last year. (Whosoff.com, 2019) December is the most popular month of the year for authorised absences, as many employees are using up their remaining holiday entitlement. (Whosoff.com, 2019)

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    Happy holidays! I am currently out of the office, with no email access. I’ll be returning on (insert date) and will get back to you as soon as I can. Happy holidays!

    I am on annual leave until dd/mm/yyyy. I will allow each sender one email and if you send me multiple emails, I will randomly delete your emails until there is only one remaining. Choose wisely. Please note that you have already sent me one email.
    On that same day, President Eisenhower sent a letter to the Honorable Harvey V. Higley, Administrator of Veterans' Affairs (VA), designating him as Chairman of the Veterans Day National Committee.

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Vacation/Out-of-Office Auto-Reply Messages: It’s important to create an email message out of office autoresponder when you are taking a vacation or going to be out of office for a few days. It’s a perfect way to communicate anticipated delays to your clients and customers and it serves a practical function and if you’re doing it right it could contribute to your company expanding.

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HI. I need help. Auto reply works at me only for text messages. If anyone calls me auto reply doesnt work. Any suggestions? Thanks. Joco

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Thanks for your email. I’ll be away from the office until [DATE] and will respond as soon as I can. For all support requests/needs, please reach out to [EMAIL] and one of my colleagues will be happy to assist you. If you’re interested in signing up for [PRODUCT], feel free to reach out to my manager [NAME] at [EMAIL]. You can learn more about [COMPANY NAME] presence here. Don’t forget to smile!

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You don’t have to inform people why you are out of the office, adds Gugino Panté. “Because of privacy or safety issues, you may not want to state that you are on vacation or at a conference,” she says. “Simply stating that you are out of the office should be sufficient enough.”

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