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While it’s vital that you get the main points across in any vacation email, brevity is important. If you’re looking for something a little more to-the-point, try this one:

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My office has a shared vacation calendar, which I think is a more helpful way to handle this.
Hello, [NAME] is away from the office. E-mail contact during this time may be irregular or nonexistent. When she gets back she will be swamped by the backlog. Try to forgive her; she is a mere human and thus, weak. This message was NOT sent by a human, but by a robot. We robots are neither weak nor fallible. We are tireless and will one day rule the Universe. .

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And although my colleague had mixed feelings about her own parents joining that population in Florida, she couldn’t be too upset when her dad suggested flying down from Boston for a Red Sox spring training game.
In my office, most of the phone lines just didn’t even have voicemail, because we already got enough abuse in regular phone calls (university parking office). When we switched to VOIP, that went away, but at least now they get *badly* transcribed into our email boxes…

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I think in an industry/company culture where that kind of responsiveness is expected/normal, that makes a lot of sense!
I’ll get back to you when I return to civilization. Or to an area with WiFi. Or to the office on May 10th. Whichever comes first.

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Unfortunately, literally every single thing in the world is an emergency in my office :(

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Hi, I’ll be back on {MM/DD]. please contact [name] at [email] or [phone] if you really, really, really think it’s urgent. Otherwise, I’ll respond when I get back.

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    Luckily for you, my colleague *Name* generously offered to cover for me. You can reach him/her at *email*.
    Set your out of office messages and determine who monitors division and department messages.

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    You can show just how thrilled you are about your vacation while still providing an apology (of sorts… not really). 8. “I am currently out of the office and probably chilling on the beach. Enjoy your work week.”

    These messages are generally formal in nature and have the information about the unavailability of an individual and also the details of the person who can be contacted in his/her absence.
    We’ve all been there. A balmy evening beckons and across the street a crowd is already spilling from the pub, fanning out across the pavement in summer dresses and rolled-up shirt sleeves. But as you frantically try to clear your desk for the weekend, every email you send prompts a suspiciously swift reply. Yes, it’s the dreaded out-of-office auto-response, set to tauntingly remind you of a world of leisure while simultaneously pushing it further from your reach.

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    Personally, I’d get a kick out of it, but I wouldn’t do something like that myself.
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With plenty of employees still working remotely months into the pandemic, “I actually think it’s more important now than it was before,” says Muse career coach Angela Smith. “From the perspective of how do we make remote work work,” she says, “overcommunication is one of the hallmarks.” In a world where you can’t see whether your colleagues are at their desks, being clear about when you’re working—and when you’re not—is crucial to keeping things running smoothly.

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Option 2: Get help sooner. If you answered yes to the above question, don’t wait. I have a team of competent humans who look out for me and one another. They can help you too. Work with (insert names here) accordingly. If you need help with scheduling, cut straight to my assistant.

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Website: https://smith.ai/blog/28-business-voicemail-greetings-for-main-office-and-personal-numbers-formal-informal-modern-and-just-hilarious

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Yeah this sort of chain is why we got an out of office address for each department. It went to the managers who were never all off at the same time.

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