“You have reached [Sandy and Bill’s] voice mail. Please leave your message after the beep so we can call you back if we want to.”
The dialogue “You may remember me from..” by Troy McClure is uncannily iconic for all Simpsons fans. It has also evolved into an autoresponder saga. By the time the reader realizes that they are going to wait a while, they would have already had the fun of reading this hilarious convo. Have a look at this funny out of office reply and see if your associates would love to hear it:
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Also, a lot of you have asked where you can find Aviation Gin, so I had the whizzes in our website department whip up this locator aviationgin.com/locator
Sorry, you missed me. I’ll be away from the office until [date]. As my inbox didn’t join me on this trip, I will only be responding to emails only when I return. That will be on [date].
I am not able to set OOO messages at all. Most of the people who are contacting me do so through custom aliases that then come to our team, who each handles specifics. Even if I’m out someone else is available, but I can’t know who is supposed to handle that specific email to be able to redirect without naming everyone, and then confusing things more when Client A gets the same reply as Client B but one needs to go to teammate C and the other to teammates D & E. Then to make just that bit more complicated, there are the clients who think that going around the system to email the teammates directly at our personal email addresses is better but pitch a hissy when we’re OOO but they didn’t get a notice? I just set rules to forward those.
PS: We love our downtime and here at HAR, we're big believers everyone needs a vacay from work. Yes, even you—the social media junkies, the workaholics, the entrepreneurial diehards who accidentally (or "accidentally") take their smartphone into the shower.
Sorry to miss you. I wrapped up everything at the office and am off on vacation until [DAY OF WEEK], [DATE]. Anyway, if your question or favour can wait, great. If not, do me a favour and forward your email to [EMAIL] and you’ll be well-treated. Thanks. (Source: Futureofworking.com)
The only thing I add to that boilerplate is if I’m working but mostly unavailable.
Here’s my pet peeve: OOOs that specifically state the person “won’t have access to email.” It contributes to this pervasive idea that an employee who might technically be ABLE to check her work email while OOO better have a damn good reason why she won’t be doing so. Which calls back to the reason someone’s OOO is no one else’s business. Whether you’re OOO because you’re on your honeymoon, having your gall bladder removed, or robbing a bank, OOO should automatically imply unavailability for work stuff. Full stop.
I’m out of the office until October 19, 2020, with limited access to my e-mails. For urgent matters call me on my mobile: +111 1111 or send an e-mail to [email protected].
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Yup pretty sure. I remember stuff like they’re going to visit Mickey, they miss him, they haven’t seen him in a long time…honestly it read to me like someone under the influence of something when they wrote it.
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It’s possible I might quote from some responses to this in an upcoming column, so please note if you don’t want me to do that with yours!
I’ll be unreachable for a few days starting on December 11th because I’ll be at Growth Marketing Conference. I’ll have limited ability to return phone calls and emails until I return on December 13th, but if you want to talk accounting software options or learn all about the latest growth marketing tactics and tips when I return, please shoot me an email. I’ll get back to you as soon as possible. If you need immediate assistance, please contact my assistant Megan White at 971-841-0098, or at [email protected].
I’ve heard “please respond at *your* earliest convenience,” but never the other way around.
I will be checking email throughout the day and will try to respond to messages promptly (please flag urgent.