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Because I used to get phone calls that defaulted to, “I need the director”, I had my out of office mail set to:

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I hope you will be celebrating the season soon. However, if your email is time-sensitive, please contact [Alternate Name] at [alternate email] and one of our busy elves will be happy to help.
I will be out of the office starting (Starting Date) through (End Date) returning(Date of Return). If you need immediate assistance during my absence, please contact (Contacts Name) at (Contacts Email Address). Otherwise I will respond to your emails as soon as possible upon my return. Thank you for your message. How do you respond to holiday greetings? "And (also) to you!" You too! Thanks, same to you! Happy New Year to you and yours (when you want to extend the wishes to the other person's family) How do you let clients know you are going on vacation? .

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The big issue I have with the example in the post is that not only is it unnecessarily long-winded, but you have to listen through all the chattiness to get to the “here’s who to contact in a real emergency” part. The tone does rub me wrong, but I’m willing to roll with that as a personality/company culture thing.
There’s a video game that got released with hatch as in trapdoor translated as hatch as in escape from egg.

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Q. Will Supply Chain, Purchasing, Receiving, Mail Services and other such departments be open during winter break?
Scared of offending a coworker who may or may not celebrate the holidays? Worry not — I’ve got the perfect email for you. If this OOO message does anything particularly well, it’s that it respects the differing views, religions, traditions, and opinions of your coworkers — while amusing so many others.

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This is so funny to be because I would chuckle getting those! You have personal context which is how you know that there is an aggeressive/accusatory tone….but without that context I would interpret these as boundaried and light-hearted. (With the exception of the ‘momtears’ one, that would feel overly personal to me.)

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https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/420oan/companywide_email_30000_employees_autoresponders/

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    You can then come up with a subject and write your text, explaining that you are out of office or unavailable.

    I would follow up with my coworkers before I follow up with an outside client. “I see an email from Wakeen asking for a copy of the 2020 TPS report. Before I follow up with him, did anyone get him the copy?” It just make a department look dysfunctional if they can’t communicate internally and get their act together before contacting an outside person.
    University-wide mail services will be running a reduced schedule, accepting all mail from both postal zones and sorting; however, deliveries will be made to only a few approved locations on Main Campus. Hospital and clinical operations will not be impacted and will receive normal mail pickup and deliveries during winter break.

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    The idea for this one is to pick your favourite Christmas carol and repurpose it for your out-of-office response. It’s festive and sure to get a laugh! (Whatever you do, just don’t pick Baby It’s Cold Outside).

    COMPLETELY agree. Every time I see an OOO for a two-hour doctor’s appointment I have to fight the urge to reply with “How much are you paid?” because I know there is no scenario in which I would have to explain myself if I don’t answer an email for a few hours and if you are that important you better make a LOT more than I do.
    The only thing I add to that boilerplate is if I’m working but mostly unavailable.

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    Hah! Maternity/parental leave is often 1 year here, so there is zero expectation you will read or “catch up” afterwards. We keep our email addresses during where I work (Canadian government), so it’s standard to put an OOO that just says “on parental leave. Please contact X instead” with no reference to actually reviewing any of those emails, and often not even a projected date of return since people often flex their return date or take extra time, or just return to a different position entirely (out of choice).

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    I do feel like the person who wrote it may have some issues in their organization with, oh let’s call it fire fighting. People who don’t necessarily think through the process of who would be most effective at dealing with the problem at hand. This reads like the message of someone who is used to getting everything dumped in their email and this OOO is an attempt to manage expectations and distribute issues to the people most able to quickly and effectively deal with a range of problems

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    Boss would put up an OOO when attending an event off-site, but would still be answering their emails, which meant that I would get “Boss said you were the correct contact, can you help?” Inevitably, I would respond and, two hours later, Boss would too, cc-ing me on the original email in which they shared the exact same info I had earlier that day. It was MADDENING.

    If yes, oops, you’ve missed her/him. I’m [David]. I’m an autoresponder. [Your Name] is out of the office. I’m all alone here. But it’s okay. After all, this is the only time of the year I’m around.
    Is this heaven? No, it’s Iowa. That’s where I’ll be for the next couple of days, giving my last out of town keynote of the year (yay!). I don’t know if there really is a Field of Dreams, but I’ll be in search of it in between checking emails and getting back to you as quickly as I can. If you need something while I’m stuck in a corn field, you can send a note to my assistant and she will be happy to help you.

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If those weren’t bad enough, if anyone on that lists sets up an out-of-office message, it *automatically* replies all. If the email bounces back, it bounces back reply all. One guy left the company and his email had a permanent out-of-office auto reply. The list was quite busy for a month or so and the message popped up multiple times a day.

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ContentsHow to Set Up an Out of Office Reply in the Outlook Desktop AppHow to Set Up Out of Office Replies in the Microsoft Outlook Web Version

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