1.) Welcome to John Doe. Our telephone hotline is not occupied over the holidays. Our office hours can be found on our website at www.joendoe.de - Thank you for your confidence. We wish you and your loved ones happy holidays and a happy new year.
Not an out of office reply but a voicemail greeting: at a previous job I called someone and her voicemail greeting said that she would be out of the office from Day – Day and that her voicemail wasn’t accepting messages during that time, click! The time in question was six months prior. Plenty of people she worked with and for could have called her on it and apparently had not, so she just … didn’t get voicemails. Like, that was not a way you could communicate with her.
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One of my co-workers, who was involved in a lot of committees and consequently got even more than the usual share of email around my place, put up an OOO message that said she was going to be “on pot for the week of the 15th.”
Every time I read it, it just gets funnier. On r/talesfromtechsupport, filter by top posts of all time, it’s on the first page. The punch line is … *chef kiss.
To thank you for a wonderful year of hard work, the company is holding a virtual holiday party via Zoom on Wednesday, December 23, 2020 at 8pm EST. Please dress in your best ugly sweater, so everyone gets into a festive mood. We hope that our valuable team members from around the world will clear out some time in their busy schedules to come celebrate with us.
Here’s my pet peeve: OOOs that specifically state the person “won’t have access to email.” It contributes to this pervasive idea that an employee who might technically be ABLE to check her work email while OOO better have a damn good reason why she won’t be doing so. Which calls back to the reason someone’s OOO is no one else’s business. Whether you’re OOO because you’re on your honeymoon, having your gall bladder removed, or robbing a bank, OOO should automatically imply unavailability for work stuff. Full stop.
If you have any questions regarding our previous business together; if you need me to direct you to someone who can help you at Jones consulting; or if you would like to continue our conversation, please don’t hesitate to contact me at [email protected], or by phone at [number].
But perhaps we have it all wrong, and are simply enslaving ourselves further to technology by toiling over OOOs that are personality-packed, marketing-friendly perfection. Maybe we need to be altogether more standoffish if we want to make our OOOs really work for us? NYU Professor Meredith Broussard, who’s the author of Artificial Unintelligence: How Computers Misunderstand the World, takes the inspiration for her OOO from US writer, poet and children’s author E.B. White, who once turned down an invitation from President Eisenhower with the words “I must decline, for secret reasons”. Accordingly, Broussard’s OOO reads simply: “I am out of the office, for secret reasons.”
Education Details: 1. The traditional ones. Hello, Thank you for your email. I will be out of the office until [date of return]. If there is a need for an immediate assistance, then feel free to reach out to my colleague [contact name] on [contact email/phone number] who should be able to help.
4.) Добро пожаловать в «Вася Пупкин и Ко» Solutions. Из-за корпоративного события наши офис-менеджеры сегодня не доступны. Вы можете оставить сообщение. Мы будем к вашим услугам снова в понедельник. Спасибо за ваше понимание.
Website: https://www.ringcentral.com/us/en/blog/setting-up-vacation-and-holiday-call-rules/
You can clarify that there’s a possibility that you’ll see the email before the return date, but you can’t guarantee it.
COMPLETELY agree. Every time I see an OOO for a two-hour doctor’s appointment I have to fight the urge to reply with “How much are you paid?” because I know there is no scenario in which I would have to explain myself if I don’t answer an email for a few hours and if you are that important you better make a LOT more than I do.
I’m currently out of the office, enjoying some peanuts and Cracker Jacks with my family. Can you guess where I am? That’s okay, you’re busy.
I’m not bothered by it, but I use “when I return” instead. I don’t want people to think I’m checking emails when I’m out.
I'm probably in the middle of a tree farm right now, getting covered in tree sap, so my hands would stick to my keyboard if I tried to respond to your email. I'll respond to your email once I am back at work on [date].
Mike Vardy is a writer, speaker, productivity strategist, and founder of Productivityist. He is the author of The Front Nine: How to Start the Year You Want Anytime You Want, The Productivityist Playbook, and TimeCrafting: A Better Way to Get the Right Things Done, coming soon from Mango Publishing.