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Hey, there! I’m out of the office this week, but my Twitter signal is always on. Seriously, I’ve got robotic wonder thumbs! (No, not really.) I never fail to tweet fascinating stories about how people can win big with their marketing efforts. So, until I’m back at my desk, won’t you follow me [LINK]? Whether you follow me or not, I’ll get back to you as soon as I can upon returning to my desk on [DATE].

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Hi stranger, Sorry I'm unable to reply to your email. I'm off frolicking in the meadows. Please do not contact me until I'm back.
I think in an industry/company culture where that kind of responsiveness is expected/normal, that makes a lot of sense! .

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Dear all, I am out of the office until 4, February. If you need immediate assistance please send me a message on my cell phone: +111 1111. Otherwise, I will respond to your emails as soon as possible. Thanks, (YOUR NAME)
The dialogue “You may remember me from..” by Troy McClure is uncannily iconic for all Simpsons fans. It has also evolved into an autoresponder saga. By the time the reader realizes that they are going to wait a while, they would have already had the fun of reading this hilarious convo. Have a look at this funny out of office reply and see if your associates would love to hear it:

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Yes! I remember reading here the phrase: the default mode of clever is asshole. Meaning when trying to be clever backfires, you end up just looking like an asshole. I’ve given up the need to get laughs at my clever sense of humor while at work. I really hope that out of office message is for internal emails only, because the risk of this landing badly is too high.
Here are four tips to help you create an effective after-hours voicemail greeting: 1. State your business name and hours of operation upfront. The first thing your callers should hear is the name of your business or organization. If they are calling when you are closed you should also be sure to let them know your standard business hours.

what to say when answering a business phone

I am currently out of the office on my holiday – I’m probably drunk somewhere in a bar in Spain. See you when I get back.

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Obviously, not every out-of-office is set for a vacation. You also need an out-of-office if you go on an extended business trip or to a conference. But instead of simply telling people you’re at a business event, why not use this opportunity to encourage networking of new business connections?

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    Funny emails are getting trendy, but they have to be used properly. If you are absolutely sure that your recipients will have a chuckle, go ahead and write a funny out-of-office auto-reply. It might make their day.

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    (Fergus) I will be OOO from July 1-31. If you need immediate assistance, please contact Jane. (Jane) I will be OOO from July 1-31. If you need immediate assistance please contact Sansa. (Sansa) I will be OOO from July 1-31. If you need immediate assistance please contact Fergus.

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    If you’re taking a few days off and want to respond only to urgent emails, this template would be a great fit.

    Being left out is an emotional drama that unfolds in three acts: discovery, distress, and, if you can get there, detachment. These psychological rhythms prevail whether you are reeling from the whispers of a group of girls at recess or excluded from a bridge game in your assisted-living home.
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    Brief Out of Office Message. While it’s vital that you get the main points across in any vacation email, brevity is important. If you’re looking for something a little more to-the-point, try this one

    I will always assume it is an inability to interact in an adult fashion with the world of technology. There is no good reason to avoid voicemails so aggressively – those that are doing so should probably be seeking therapy to overcome their issues with technology and/or the human voice. A lot of us process text faster and more accurately than speech, especially poor-audio-quality speech recorded by someone who didn’t bother to leave all the relevant information. Most voice mails are bad.
    I had a coworker once who hated it when she got somebody’s out of office message. I asked her why it got her so bent out of shape. “Because then I have to wait until they get back to send the message again!”

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    Q. If I must be on Main Campus and have been pre-approved by leadership to work during winter break, will there be lights and heating in my building?

    I can’t wait to connect when I return [date]. Until then, please contact [Contact Name] at [contact email] for all urgent matters.
    I think simple is best, and also safest. I found the message in the post amusing as an AAM article, but if I had contacted this person on a serious and/or urgent work matter I would probably be annoyed by the comedy skit. And I was contacting them because they had messed up somehow, it would land very badly.

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what should you say when answering a business phone

Oops, too late! I’m off on holiday right now until the 16th, probably sipping on a margarita while you read this. I’ll reply when I’m back, but if it’s super urgent, contact [email protected]. It wouldn’t be right for this message to go to your boss or a client. If you’re not sure who is going to receive your message, we suggest following a more formal template.

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I have a colleague who usually does different ones for internal and external: internal will be “I’m currently in the pouring rain in a tent in the Cotswolds. I get back (hopefully without trenchfoot!) on Monday Date. Whilst I’m getting soggy please contact Email Address.” and external is just “I’m on annual leave between X and Y and will not be accessing my email. Please contact Email Address if you need assistance during this time.” We all really like their internal ones.

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Sorry I missed you. I’ll be out of the office and slow to respond until after the break. While I have you, though, help settle an argument among my colleagues and me: Die Hard 1: The Office Christmas Party Gone Wrong. Die Hard 2: Airport Conspiracy. Die Hard 3: Samuel L. Jackson. Enough said. Die Hard 4: Cyberthreat. Die Hard 5: You should probably not pick this one. Impossible! It’s like choosing a favorite child!

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The message will be automatically triggered in response to any incoming text received while the away message is turned on. Like this:

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