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HAAHAHAHAHA! i changed my voicemail to the one that is like: (rhythm to live while were young) hey its crazy crazy crazy that i’ve missed your call, don’t know why i even bother with this phone at all just leave your name and number and a reason to! i’ll try my best.. to get back to you!! hahaha i love that 1!

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The first, unscripted example is vague and awkwardly worded. The second, scripted example is clear, definite, and smooth. Research some sample scripts for business voicemail greetings before you write your own. And here are some specific voicemail greetings for doctors, lawyers, and dentists.
1. Business voicemail greeting samples. If you have a main business phone number that’s shared with the customers or publicly listed, you’ll want to make sure it has a professional voicemail message to greet callers. .

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At times voicemails contain clever and witty messages. You can be mislead if you do not understand them. In such cases use your common sense and then record your message. Make sure you set such types of voicemail greetings only for unofficial use of your phone and not for professional purposes. Don’t be a creep because I’m not talking to you. Tell who are you on hearing the beep. I’m a spirit! I will haunt you if you tell me your name and number. You have entered the gateway of heaven. Here I’m God! Be blessed after leaving your contact number. I wasn’t at office yesterday, nor today nor will I be there tomorrow. Vanish. Leave behind a trail of you after the beep. Funny Voicemail Greetings
Welcome to (company name), (short brand wording). If you know your party's extension, you may dial it now. Please listen carefully as our menu options have recently changed.

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Its called Stamp Duty over here, basically a government tax on cards issued by financial institutions. Dunno where you live buddy, but maybe thats it?:)
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Yes Alexa, indeed it is all about the energy that you put into your message. Good tip about the importance proper ending of the message. You use your face well when leaving a message. That helps as well

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Now, we’ve covered the topic a bit at length in the past, with sure-fire ways to engage callers with your business voicemail greeting. Still a solid basis for constructing your new voicemail greeting, we’ll cover a quick recap of the most important aspects of a voicemail greeting for those that are unfamiliar.

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    1.) Welcome to John Doe. Unfortunately, there is no one in the office right now or your are calling outside of business hours. Please leave a message or send an email to [email protected]. Many thanks for your call.

    -Hello? Oh hey wait a minute I can’t hear you… Sorry, hold on… Nope, still can’t hear you. You want to know why? Because I’m not here right now. So leave a message at the beep.
    Sample Short Voicemail Greeting: Hi, this is [your name]. I'm either on a call or away from my desk. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message and I'll get back to you. Thank you. Sample Business Voicemail Greeting: Hello, you've reached [X company]. We can't take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information

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    9.) Welcome to John Doe. Unfortunately, there is no one in the office right now. Please leave your name and phone number after the tone. We will call you back as soon as possible.

    Setting up your voicemail. 1. Press and hold 1. 2. Enter your password if prompted. If you are asked for a password the first time you access your voicemail, just enter the last four digits of your phone number. 3. Follow the directions to set up your password. 4.
    You can make your voicemail more interesting by adding in an amusing little fact about your business or even a short (tasteful) joke. Adding in these personal bits of information will create more impact and be memorable to your callers.

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    “Hi, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m away from[date] to [date]. If you need help with [X] before then, please contact [name] at [phone number]. Everyone else, please leave your name and number and I’ll return your call when I return. Thanks and have a great day.” “Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently [exploring Asia, hiking through the jungle in Costa Rica, hanging out on the beach in Bermuda] — or more likely, [recovering from extreme jet lag, googling ‘Are red spiders poisonous,’ or looking for SPF 150 sunscreen] and won’t be back in the office until [date]. Leave your contact info and reason for calling and I’ll get in touch then.” “Hey there, this is [your name] from [your company]. I’m out of the office until [date]. In the meantime, please direct your inquiries to [coworker’s name] at [email address]. [He, she] can also be reached at [phone number]. Thank you.”

    Website: https://www.engineerette.com/professional-voicemail-greeting-guide-for-job-seekers/
    Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.

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    9. "Hey, this is [your name]. Thanks for reaching out. I'm busy at the moment, but if you leave your name, number, and message, I'll return your call.”

    6. Hey, sorry I missed you. There may be one of the reasons why I can’t get to the phone: a) I’m with my girl (laugh), b) I am totally wasted and can’t remember how to use a phone, or c) I just don’t wanna talk to YOU.
    If done tastefully, you can promote your products or services on your voicemail greeting without sounding pushy. In fact, it’s a great way to keep customers up-to-date on company events, sales, and other news. Be sure to keep it short and have fun with it.

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37. Hi, this is [company name]. Sorry we missed your call. Leave a message and we’ll get back to you shortly.

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And, if you cannot write your own scripts and require some help, for just $175, the Grasshopper team can both script your greeting and record it for you as well. And, the best part is that for customers who have opted for the Max Plan, this service is free.

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This is (NAME) I�m sorry, I�m out of town until (DAY AND DATE). But I will be checking my messages. Leave a message at the beep and I will attend to it as soon as I can. If you have any business which requires immediate attention please contact (NAME) by dialing (EXTENSION NUMBER) now. Thanks for calling Thank you for calling. You have reached (NAME). (COMPANY NAME) is officially closed over the (HOLIDAY) period. I will be back in my office at (Date/Time). Leave a message at the beep and I will attend to it as soon as I return? Thank you and have a happy holiday season. This is (NAME), I�m on another call at the moment, but I�d really like to speak with you. Please hold and I will be with you shortly. Or if you do not wish to hold, press �1� to leave me a message or �0� for the attendant. Thank you

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15. Howdy, you’ve called [X Business Name]. We are at this time closed. Our opening hours are [State opening hours]. Please consult with our firm internet attach at [company website URL], or email us at [X email address]. Whilst you’d admire a callback, please toddle away your title and receive in contact with quantity, and our team will receive in contact with you within 24 hours.

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