You should script out your greetings, rehearse, and find a tone of voice that is reflective of your professionalism and your company’s personality. If applicable, your tone and your message should take into account that certain industries and companies are more conservative than others.
It’s a good practice for each of your team members to have their own personal business phone numbers. There are many reasons why they shouldn’t use their personal cell phone number for business, so you’ll want to give them their own phone number through your VoIP provider or phone system.

Hi! John’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
She recorded his incoming voicemail greeting of course. Taylor Swift Voicemail Recording “Hey, this is Taylor Swift and you have reached Todrick’s phone. If you’re a friend; if you’re someone he talks to regularly, he’ll probably call you back immediately. He would like you to know that if this is a financial matter of any sort, it