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Website: https://grasshopper.com/blog/perfect-voicemail-greetings-10-tips-for-recording-effective-and-professional-messages-plus-examples/
8. Funny Voicemail Greetings. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work. I'm David's answering machine. What are you? Hi, this is John's answering machine. .

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You don’t want to answer calls 24/7 (unless you’re serving clients globally and there’s an expectation of 24/7 support). If you’re unavailable during specific hours of the day, use the voicemail examples below for after-hours business calls.
2. The Simpsons Share a Funny Answering Greeting. If you’re looking for a short and simple message, we suggest turning to Homer Simpson as he tells callers to… leave a message.

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-Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.
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Website: https://www.nowblitz.com/blog/voicemail-message-examples-your-customers-will-love/

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Business Intro – quick intro announcement heard by the caller before they speak with a business representative. Usually quite short and welcoming, introducing the business to the caller.

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    The machine answering this message is connected to a 5000 volt power supply, and a relay which is wired to this small kitten. (Sound of a kitten meowing.) If you hang up before you leave a message, it will complete the circuit and fry the kitty. The choice is YOURS! The President is not in his office at this time.

    Communication » Messages & Wishes » 36+ Witty Voicemail Greetings ideas 36+ Witty Voicemail Greetings ideas. Voicemails don’t necessarily have to be monotonous or extremely jazzy or funky. What you should be looking for is a balance between the two. -So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to
    -(Very long pause) Wait! Please don’t hang up! I want to hear what you have to say.

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    Make sure you visit the recording practise page where you can record your phrases and perfect them before putting them on your phone.

    The easiest way to record and program professional voicemail greetings for your phone system is to write down a script. Choose someone to record your script - the one who can speak without hesitating or stuttering, has a friendly voice and can annunciate and pronounce each name and word clearly.
    While missed calls aren’t ideal, you can let your caller know you’re still there for them by having a great voicemail greeting. The best business voicemail greetings let your customers (and potential customers) know why you’re not available and how they can best get in contact with your business. They are also short and to the point. You usually want to keep your greeting between 6 and 24 seconds long so callers don’t hang up halfway through.

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    Not in a chatty mood? Here's how to go directly to voicemail or send a voice message.
    “Hello! You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name], [your job title]. I’m currently either away from my desk or on the other line. Please leave your name, telephone number, and a short message after the beep, and I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I’m available.” Press and hold the 1 key to access the voicemail system. When you hear the recorded message, press the # key to bring you to the system menu. Press 4, for the Personal Options followed by 2 for Personal Greeting. Follow the prompts to record, listen to, re-record and save your greeting. How do I change my voicemail number on Samsung Galaxy s8? Find “Voicemail number” Press Phone. Press the menu icon. Press Settings. Press Voicemail settings. Press Voicemail number. Save voicemail number. Key in +61414121121 and press OK. +61414121121. Return to the home screen. Press the Home key to return to the home screen. Dial voicemail: Press and then hold on the envelope icon displayed on the main screen. Enter Your Accounts Password: Enter the password if prompted. Delete voicemail: Tap 7 on any voicemail and it will be deleted successfully. Open the dial pad on the device. Open the application drawer and scroll through to find the Phone app. Dial Voicemail. Tapping the number 1 and then hitting the green phone icon at the bottom should call Voicemail. Enter a password (if there is one). Skip through messages. Delete a voicemail. Log into Google Voice. Click on the gear icon. Select “Settings” from the menu options. Click the “Voicemail & Text” button. Click “Record New Greeting” in the Voicemail Greeting section. Enter the name for the greeting you are going to record. Select forwarding phones. Click “Connect.”

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    5. Trekkies Have a Fun Outgoing Message to Use. If you’re a #Trekkie or a #Trekker, this is the best of our funny voicemail greetings. Let Spock deliver your outgoing message to all of your callers.

    Any business answering machine greeting you use should also be customized and personal for your needs. If you have an emergency service, that a caller can activate through the press of a button for faster response, then you should indicate this in the message. It can also be helpful to remind callers of the information they need to provide in their message, such as their name, contact information, and reason for calling. You should also thank the caller for his or her call at the end of your message and indicate that you plan on returning the call as soon as possible. You might also Like Reminiscence February 8, 2014
    Top 13 Professional Voicemail Greetings – Examples, Scripts, Samples, Audio Recordings

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Hello. (pause) Say something!! Aren’t you gonna talk at all? Why aren’t you saying something? Oh, I forgot. I need to say beep…

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Press 6 after listening to a message to forward a copy of it to another person's CenturyLink voicemail. For example, you get a message at home that you want to forward to your neighbor, or your children share time in two households. Whenever a message arrives for them, just press 6 to forward it on.

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You have reached the , Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number and target or list of targets and we’ll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.

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