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Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you.
1. Funny Answering Greeting from Seinfeld. Back in 1997, Seinfeld’s character, George Costanza, attempts to avoid a breakup call from his girlfriend and we hear his comical outgoing machine recording. .

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26. Thank you for calling [your name] at [company name]. Unfortunately, I can’t take your call right now. Please leave your name, number and a message, and I will call you back as soon as I have the opportunity.
Sometimes, you need to step away from work and live a little! This is perfectly okay, but make sure you leave a well-recorded voicemail greeting to keep your customers happy and content. Read these two examples of professional vacation greetings.

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Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You guessed it.
4.) Bienvenue chez John Doe. Vous pouvez nous contacter pendant les heures de bureau du lundi au jeudi de 9h à midi et de 14h à 16h et le vendredi de 9h à midi. Nous vous invitons à nous donner votre demande par mail sur [email protected] et nous reviendrons vers vous dès que possible. Merci.

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8. “Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and the reason you’d like to chat, and I’ll get to back to you ASAP.”

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A dentist is similar to a doctor. Unlike a doctor, a dentist is going to get far more non-urgent calls as patients will want to know when they can pick up various orders, as well as to book follow-up appointments. The key here is prioritizing so the dentist can respond promptly to the patients who need emergency dental work and other urgent consultations.

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    If you like to keep things simple, opt for a basic greeting. Most voicemail options allow you to record just your name, which lets callers know they’ve reached the right person.

    Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY — Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 years ago, but we know he’s still out there somewhere. So . . . leave your name and number and tell us where *YOU* saw Elvis!
    When autocomplete results are available use up and down arrows to review and enter to select. Touch device users, explore by touch or with swipe gestures.

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    The standard default house phone voicemail or answering machine sound effectFree Download: https://uptona.com/wW2GLPQ6Subscribe for more Sounds!http://bit.ly

    4. Hello… pause. Hello… long pause. Who is this? long pause again Is anyone on the line?… long pause and beep sound.
    Voicemail Service Local Voicemail Service Toll Free Voicemail Announcement Only Line Read My Voicemail Question & Answer Line Automated Order-Taking

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    Website: https://cellphones.lovetoknow.com/cell-phone-guides-how-tos/great-quotes-leave-voicemail

    2. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.
    Here are a few reasons why professionally produced cell phone greetings and voice messages will help your business while you're on the move: The quality of voice and production that comes with a professionally produced voice mail greeting will tell your callers that you are a professional and someone to be reckoned with in the business world. If your business is global, your voicemail greeting can be translated and recorded and produced in multiple languages for your business audience. Skillfully tailorded, your voice mail message can also be used for promoting a new product, service or milestone for your business.

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    Voicemails need to maintain a professional consistency that’s aligned with the entity it’s representing. That said, the structure can vary depending on the situation. There’s no template set in stone. In fact, trite and generic should be off the table. The goal should be a balance of uniqueness and practicality.

    Length – if your callers typically wait 2 minutes at a time, then at least 2 minutes of programming should be the goal. The idea is to ensure the callers don’t hear repeated messages every time they call. A typical on-hold message is 4-8 minutes in length.
    For those with voicemail greetings that get changed about as often as a new president is elected, know that this is doing a serious disservice to the caller-recipient relationship. It signals to callers that the business is anything but an authority, most likely not very detail oriented, and has questionable overall credibility and competency.

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Thank you for calling BusinessCo. Unfortunately, all our Business Representatives are currently attending to other enquiries. Your call is important to us, so please leave your name, phone number and a short message and we will return your call by the end of the business day. Thank you.

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And this one (from Brad Lund, of Baltimore) made me giggle loudest and longest: "This is the Lund residence. The answering machine is on vacation. This is the refrigerator speaking. State your message slowly and clearly. I'll write it down and stick it to myself with one of those little magnets."

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When you’re recording an answering machine greeting for your home, or a voicemail greeting, some people like to keep it funny and light. They may record a message together, have one of their young children record, play silly music in the background or create some kind of a joke. While it’s fine to be funny, especially on a home recording, you should probably avoid being crude, particularly if you think children may be calling your home. Telemarketers may use any information given in an answering machine greeting.

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