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-You have reached the voice mailbox of (your name). If you’re a hot chick/guy, you may leave a message at the tone. If your one of (your name)’s friends, you may also leave a message at the tone. If you’re not hot and not one of (your name)’s friends, call back when you are.

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OpenPhone is a modern business phone service app for startups, small businesses, and individuals. OpenPhone separates your professional and personal communications and enables you to personalize your number to reflect your own brand. Use your business number directly from your existing cell phone!
"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you." .

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Are you a "Gone With the Wind" fan? Then you'll want to copy this one, which Anne S. Kight has been using on her home machine for years. In the background, you hear the swelling overture from GWTW. After a few seconds, a gently accented southern voice says: "As God is my witness, I simply cannot come to the phone right now. So please leave a message, and I'll call you back -- tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day!"
In the case that your business is closed due to an emergency, it's only worth it to go into detail if the problem is affecting everyone in the area. Otherwise, stick to your Company Wide Voicemail Greeting, but remove the stated hours and tell callers that you're currently closed. Thank you for calling Cutlass Technology. Our store is currently closed. Please leave your name and phone number so that someone from our team can follow up with you. For more information, please visit www.cutlasstechnology.com

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One of the chief considerations in recording an answering machine greeting is your audience. Who will be listening to your answering machine or voicemail salutation? Is this a business line or a home phone line? Furthermore, just how much information do you want to give out to potential strangers, like telemarketers, who may be calling your home? Long answering machine greetings may be inconvenient for callers.
Website: https://theawesomedaily.com/funny-ways-to-answer-the-phone-hello-we-have-plenty/

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This is a handy feature if you're checking messages away from home. Let's say you're dialing your retrieval number from a neighbor's phone, who also has CenturyLink voicemail. As soon as you hear their voice mail prompts, press * and enter your 10-digit phone number and password to access your mailbox.

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10.) Buongiorno, e benvenuti alla John Doe. Per motivi tecnici, non possiamo rispondere personalmente alla vostra chiamata. Ringraziamo per la vostra comprensione. Stiamo lavorando sodo per trovare una soluzione. Se volete, potete lasciare un messaggio sulla nostra homepage: www.johndoe.de – Grazie e arrivederci.

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    8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back."

    We actually know a top insurance sales guy who did a sales motivational message every day just like this, and people used to call just to listen to his thoughts.
    Website: https://www.marketingmessages.com/media/Sample-Voice-Prompts-For-Healthcare.pdf

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    Any business answering machine greeting you use should also be customized and personal for your needs. If you have an emergency service, that a caller can activate through the press of a button for faster response, then you should indicate this in the message. It can also be helpful to remind callers of the information they need to provide in their message, such as their name, contact information, and reason for calling. You should also thank the caller for his or her call at the end of your message and indicate that you plan on returning the call as soon as possible. You might also Like Reminiscence February 8, 2014

    Our TIPP: Our prompts configurator helps you find the right voice and also helps you with text suggestions, selection of music and speakers demos. With just a few clicks, you can compile your selection or desired prompt(s) and send it to us.
    2. Mention Hours of Operation Upfront. Most callers expect their call to be answered. Once they realize that your office is currently closed, the most important piece of information they probably want to know is your standard business hours.

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    Many messaging apps now offer the ability to send voice messages to contacts without having to make a phone call in the first place. Using this method, you're bypassing a phone call and voicemail entirely, but it serves the same purpose.

    One of the chief considerations in recording an answering machine greeting is your audience. Who will be listening to your answering machine or voicemail salutation? Is this a business line or a home phone line? Furthermore, just how much information do you want to give out to potential strangers, like telemarketers, who may be calling your home? Long answering machine greetings may be inconvenient for callers.
    Website: https://www.thebalancesmb.com/on-the-phone-or-busy-voicemail-greeting-examples-2533545

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    In Australian English it’s pronounced with the vowel /a:/ like in ‘part’. Problems arise when people use the /ʌ/ vowel (like in ‘up’) instead of /æ/ or /a:/. If you do this is will sound like the worst swear word in English. Many non-native speakers often pronounce the vowel /æ/ more like /ʌ/ because they don’t have a vowel like /æ/ in their first language. Many speakers of European languages will do this (Spanish speakers and Italian speakers) and also speakers of Japanese and Korean. This problem with /æ/ also means that if you say the word ‘back’ in your voicemail greeting sample, you are likely to pronounce it more like ‘buck’. remember to pronounce word endings in English. Check you aren’t dropping any endings off or mispronouncing them.

    If your business is off for a holiday, it's a common courtesy to update your voicemail to acknowledge the closure. Mention the closure in the beginning of the message, convey when your business is reopening, and don't forget to wish the callers a happy holiday if the occasion calls for it. If you're away from your office, check your voicemail remotely to keep up with incoming messages if necessary. Or get voicemail to email capabilities set up on your phone system. Thank you for calling Merlow Plumbing. We are closed for Christmas from December 24th, 2015, until January 2nd, 2016. Our normal business hours are Monday through Thursday, 8 am - 6 pm. Please leave your message after the tone. Have a happy holiday, and we look forward to seeing you in the New Year. 5. Emergency Situation Voicemail Greeting
    A business answering machine greeting is a message recorded on the voicemail or answering machine of a company. Since this message is going to be heard by at least some of your customers, you should be sure to keep the message professional. For the most part, you should not create a message that is silly or funny, but instead provide important and useful information in a way that is professional and fairly fast. You can, however, use the message as a quick opportunity to include a brief statement about a particular service you offer such as “Thank you for calling The House of Pies, home of the world famous zucchini and artichoke pie.”

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That’s why it’s critical that each customer interaction with your business is consistent, positive, and represents the values and personality of your company. This includes your storefront, website, social media presence, emails, and every interaction you have with your customers, both online and in-person.

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6. Keep Your Recording Up to Date. If your business is closing on one of its normal operating days for a holiday, or is dealing with an emergency or unforseen situation, you should update your after hours announcement to avoid confusion.

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For more accessibility options, see Learn how to navigate Skype for Business using accessible features.

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You message should convey the same courtesy to your callers as a person would who is speaking to someone in your office. Saying things like "thank you for calling" and "have a nice day", in addition to watching your tone of voice, will help you to represent your office in a compassionate and professional manner.

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