From Burke, an exercise in antisocial oddness: "You have reached the live psychic hot line. We know who you are and why you are calling, so at the beep, hang up."
As a bonus, here is an example of our own holiday voicemail greeting here at OpenPhone:
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Press 1 to turn autoplay on and off. When autoplay is turned on and you call to listen to your messages, the messages will immediately start playing. If autoplay is off, then you will be presented with the main menu options to select from (e.g., 1- listen, 2 - send).
Business Intro – quick intro announcement heard by the caller before they speak with a business representative. Usually quite short and welcoming, introducing the business to the caller.
Standard greeting with your name: "At the tone, please record your message to [your mailbox's name]." Activate and manage the "message waiting" notification
1. State Your Business Name. The first thing your callers should hear is the name of your business or organization. This assures them that they have dialed the right phone number and keeps them on the line.
10. Escape the Voicemail Box Option. You have reached the voicemail of [person’s name]. If you would like to leave a voicemail, please press 1 and leave your name, number, and a brief message.
9.( مرحبا بكم في .JohnDoe للأسف، لا يوجد أحد في المكتب في الوقت الحالي. يرجى ترك اسمكم ورقم هاتفكم بعد سماع الرنة. ونحن سنعيد الاتصال بكم مرة أخرى في أقرب وقت ممكن.
Hello… pause. Hello… long pause. Who is this? long pause again Is anyone on the line?…long pause and beep sound.
Website: https://www.onsip.com/voip-resources/smb-tips/after-hours-voicemail-and-auto-attendant-greetings
1. Business voicemail greeting samples. If you have a main business phone number that’s shared with the customers or publicly listed, you’ll want to make sure it has a professional voicemail message to greet callers.
2. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.
Hello… my name is (your name)’s refrigerator. He/she isn’t home right now to take your call. To leave him/her a message, speak very slowly so I can stick the message with the help of these refrigerator magnets.
-Hello. All of our operators are busy right now, but if you’ll leave your name, telephone number, a brief message, and the time you called, we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you and have a pleasant day.
"Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets."
10.) Guten Tag. Sie sind verbunden mit der Mustermann GmbH. Aus technischen Gründen können wir im Moment Ihren Anruf leider nicht persönlich entgegennehmen. Wir hoffen sehr auf Ihr Verständnis und arbeiten mit Hochdruck an einer Lösung. Wenn Sie möchten, können Sie uns gerne eine Nachricht über unsere Homepage www.mustermann.de zukommen lassen. Vielen Dank und auf Wiederhören.
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