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Recording voicemail greetings for your business or personal life requires a separate list of priorities, because they are being used for two distinct purposes and will be heard by two very different types of callers. I have a friend with two cell phones - one for work, and one for personal calls - and if you call both lines, you would never know it's the same person.

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If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service.
If you’re an entrepreneur or small business owner who’s debating the benefits of getting a voicemail greeting, keep reading! .

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4. Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.
From the main menu, press 5 (Leave this mailbox and log on as another subscriber.)

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7.) Welcome to John Doe DE, your specialist for sample products. If you want to place an order then please use the ordering process in our online shop www.johndoe.de - We look forward to your order. For all other questions, please contact our service department via email at [email protected] - we will get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for your call.
A phone call to your business is often the first encounter your customers and prospects have with your company. If no one is available to take the call, having the best professional voicemail greetings possible is important to leave a great first impression and to ensure that business opportunities don’t slip by.

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Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone]. Due to the current pandemic, our team members are working remotely and are available [Monday through Friday from 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time]. Please leave a message with your name, number, and how we can serve you. We will respond as promptly as possible. Thank you for your patience during this unprecedented time. Let’s get through this together. Stay safe and well.

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To turn the message notification on and off, from the main menu, select 4 (Mailbox Options) and then press 1 (Notification Options). Now follow prompts to turn the notifications on or off. If the new message indicator remains on after you've listened to your new messages, try turning the notification off and on several times and end with it set to on. Check your messages and access your mailbox

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    Hi, we are not home at the moment. If you want to sell us something that we don’t actually need, start speaking now and hang up once it beeps. Everyone else, please speak after the beep and hang up once you’re done.

    We’re keeping it simple with this one. Just a few basic elements to help you get started. As long as you know who your audience is, the message you wish to convey, and the information you need from the caller, the rest should fall into place quite nicely. Let’s face it, a voicemail greeting for a lumber company will probably be different than that of a psychologist’s office. One greeting is aimed at securing potential customers, and the other is geared towards appointments, more or less. Once you are certain who your caller is, the better your voicemail. Center on your audience, first and foremost. Knowing what to relate ensures that your caller will leave the right message. For instance, if you’re a retail store, you would include your hours of operations, and perhaps any specials that you’re running. If you are a therapist’s office, then you’d need to include an alternate number in case a patient is having an issue and requires immediate help. Again, this will vary depending on the business. Here, a therapist would definitely request the caller leave their contact information. However, a retail store chain might not request that. There are also complex voicemail systems such as those used by mobile phone services, which ask you to press a certain number on your phone, where you are asked to leave your account information. Again, as you can see, it all boils down to the demographics of your callers, and what you need from them to conduct the best business possible. Depending on the situation, your caller might be in a good mood or not. In either case, they’ll probably be eagerly awaiting your call. So, it stands to reason that you only promise them a call back if you can deliver. In other words, if you’re a small shop and you’ve decided to close due to a much-needed sabbatical, then don’t leave a voicemail greeting where you promise them to call right back. However, if you have an active customer service staff, then you can promise to return their call within the same day.
    4.) Bienvenue chez John Doe. Vous pouvez nous contacter pendant les heures de bureau du lundi au jeudi de 9h à midi et de 14h à 16h et le vendredi de 9h à midi. Nous vous invitons à nous donner votre demande par mail sur [email protected] et nous reviendrons vers vous dès que possible. Merci.

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    I personally don't like voicemail. I don't check messages because my phone identifies missed calls. I know who these people are and why they are calling. I don't want to spend (waste)time hearing nothing of importance. I have left messages saying

    Obviously, I need to update it. And if you haven't changed your voicemail greeting in over a year, you're likely in the same boat.
    12.) Добро пожаловать в «Вася Пупкин и Ко». Вы можете связаться с нами с понедельника по пятницу с 8 утра до 12.30, и с 13.00 до 16.30. На данный момент, мы не можем ответить на ваш звонок лично. Пожалуйста, оставьте сообщение с вашим именем и номером телефона и мы вам перезвоним как можно скорее. В экстренных случаях, вы можете связаться с нами по номеру 0821 91039 - 1211. Большое спасибо.

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    Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY — Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 years ago, but we know he’s still out there somewhere. So . . . leave your name and number and tell us where *YOU* saw Elvis!

    Website: https://saraharpminter.org/answer/pre-recorded-answering-machine-messages
    Responding to voicemails is time-consuming. Fortunately, with the right greeting, you might be able to save yourself some hassle. If you don’t have an auto attendant, you can give callers the information they are looking for with your voicemail greeting. Of course, this means that your greeting may be a little lengthy, but that can work in your favor as callers will only stay on the line to leave a message if they still need assistance.

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    7.) Bem-vindo a John Doe DE, o seu especialista em produtos de amostra. Se você quiser fazer um pedido, por favor, use o processo de encomenda na nossa loja on-line www.johndoe.de - Estamos ansiosos pela sua encomenda. Para todas as outras perguntas, entre em contato com nosso departamento de atendimento via e-mail em [email protected] - vamos retornar para você o mais rápido possível. Obrigado pela sua ligação.

    You can record a personal greeting, or you can use one of the pre-recorded CenturyLink greetings. Follow the system prompts to select your greeting:
    3.) Herzlich willkommen bei Mustermann GmbH. Momentan können wir Ihren Anruf leider nicht persönlich entgegennehmen, oder Ihr Anruf erreicht uns außerhalb der Geschäftszeiten. Bitte hinterlassen Sie uns eine Nachricht mit Ihrem Namen und Rufnummer - Wir rufen Sie dann schnellstmöglich zurück. Vielen Dank und auf Wiederhören.

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Please leave us a message with your name, number, and any other necessary information, and we will return your call when the office reopens. Thank you for calling." As you can see, this professional voicemail greeting is similar to the absent receptionist greeting but more inclusive.

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5.) Bem-vindo a John Doe. Você pode nos contatar de segunda à sexta das 7:00 às 18:00 horas e aos sábados das 10:00 às 13:00 horas. Se você quiser fazer um pedido ou tem uma pergunta, por favor, deixe seu nome, número de cliente e telefone. Iremos retornar a ligação o mais rápido possível. Você sempre pode nos enviar um e-mail no [email protected]. Muito obrigado pela sua ligação – Até breve.

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It’s a good practice for each of your team members to have their own personal business phone numbers. There are many reasons why they shouldn’t use their personal cell phone number for business, so you’ll want to give them their own phone number through your VoIP provider or phone system.

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9. Holiday Closures. Thank you for calling [Company Name]; we are currently closed in observance of [holiday name]. We will return on [Date] at 8 AM Eastern Time.

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