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"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."

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1. 15 Professional Voicemail Greetings to Engage Your Callers. Sorry about your luck. If this is an emergency, hang up and call someone who can help you now.
I made this "grouchy voicemail" for whoever is tired of the boring old voicemail your phone service provides. I will have more funny voicemail greetings on .

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9. “Hey, it’s [your name] at [your company] – thanks for giving me a call! I can’t wait to chat. Just leave your name, number and I’ll call you back as soon as I have the chance. Better yet, send me a text with the best time to reach you and the reason for your call. Looking forward to hearing from you.” Text communication is becoming much more relevant now. Direct your caller to text you in case they have a question you can answer easier via text. Who knows, they might prefer text messages to phone calls too.
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Your voicemail needs to have relevant information such as your name, who the prospects are connecting to, the department you work in, why your not available to assist your prospects, when you will call them and related information, this is what the prospects would prefer hearing instead of dragging the voicemail messages speaking about your brand and more.

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33. Hi, thank you for calling me. I apologize for not answering the phone at the moment. Please leave your name, number and message, and I will call you back as soon as possible. You can also send me an email at [your email]. Thank you, and have a nice day.

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Professionally recorded phone messages and greetings are the perfect way to promote and re-enforce your business brand when customers call the business. They will put a professional touch to any message and enhance your business image. Choose between a male or female voice, recorded in the tone best suited to your business. Ideal for Business Intro Messages at the start of the call, Auto Attendant (IVR) prompts, Voicemail greetings such as one for an After-Hours Service, and On-Hold Messages. Incorporate background music for that extra touch.

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    Please leave me a message, and I will return your call upon my return. Thank you for calling. Hi, this is Jim Smith. I am currently out of town and will be returning on July 14. If you leave me a message that includes your name, telephone number and reason for calling, I will return your call when I get back. You have reached Jim Smith.

    You can decide how many times your phone will ring before a call goes to voicemail (also known as a "ring cycle"). You should be asked by an agent when you first order voicemail. If you didn't get to set it when you ordered, or if you want to change your ring cycle, call us at 800-669-7676. Keypad commands
    Website: https://www.slideshare.net/voicemailprofessional/best-voicemail-greetings

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    "You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."

    One of the chief considerations in recording an answering machine greeting is your audience. Who will be listening to your answering machine or voicemail salutation? Is this a business line or a home phone line? Furthermore, just how much information do you want to give out to potential strangers, like telemarketers, who may be calling your home? Long answering machine greetings may be inconvenient for callers.
    Creative and funny voicemail messages are great for less formal businesses but may be inappropriate for formal ones. However, if creativity is part of your job description, be sure to sprinkle a dash into your voicemail. Check out these creative and funny voicemail greetings. Top 7 business voicemail greetings. 1.

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    Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Professional - Voicemail messages that you can use in an office or business setting. Short - Voicemail greetings that are quick and get straight to the point.

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    Education Details: Business Voicemail Greeting Examples. Coming up with a good business voicemail greeting can be trickier than coming up with a personal voicemail greeting. Take some cues from the below to ensure callers leave a voicemail message after listening to your greeting. Additionally, consider writing a voicemail script to ensure you don’t leave out church answering machine greetings

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    5. “Hi, you’ve reached [company name]. We can’t take your call right now but we will call you back as soon as we’re available. Please leave your name, number and reason for your call. We know your time is precious, so to skip the back and forth, kindly leave a few different times of day that work best with your schedule and we will do our best to reach you then! Have a great day.” This greeting lets your caller know that not only your time is precious, but you realize theirs is as well.

    These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It’s natural; not everyone has a funny bone inside them. But that doesn’t mean you get stuck with a boring, cliché greeting. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone).
    Photo in the article by “International SAP & Web Consulting” https://www.ybierling.com/st/blog-various-how-to-change-default-messaging-app Related posts: Question: How To Set Voicemail On Android? How Do I Set Up Voicemail On My Android Phone? Quick Answer: How To Check Voicemail Android? Quick Answer: How To Change Voicemail Android? How To Change Voicemail Password On Android? Quick Answer: How To Set Up Voicemail On Android? Note: Android text messages are stored in SQLite database folder which you can only Use the system setting (Settings -> Display -> Theme) to enable Dark theme. Use

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The real estate agent cannot take the call right at the moment, but promises to get back to the client in the shortest span of time. Custom Music on Hold Custom Greetings for specific day and time Voicemail to Email Retrieve VM from any extension or phone User freindly web portal to manage the settings

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4. Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.

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-(Very long pause) Wait! Please don’t hang up! I want to hear what you have to say.

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“Hi! You have reached [your business]. All of our staff are currently busy helping other callers. We understand how valuable your time is, and rather than keeping you on hold, we will make sure to call you back.Be sure to leave us a detailed message with your name and number. We will return your call within two business hours. Thanks!”

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