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3. "Hey, this is [your name]. If you're calling for [X reason], please [contact so-and-so] or [go to our website, send me an email]. For all other inquiries, leave your name and a brief message and I'll call you back within [one, two, three] business day[s].

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A voicemail and voicemail greeting are two different things. A voicemail serves to leave a message and contact information to an individual or business. A voicemail greeting serves to welcome those who call while you are out, encouraging them to leave a message and contact information. A well-crafted voicemail greeting also serves as a tool where one can leave a good first impression.
8. Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I’m home right now, and in a moment I’ll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I’ll be thinking about it… .

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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you're in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there's a chance they won't appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead.
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If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service.

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Taking Phone Messages. In this activity, you will accurately take phone messages. Click to hear the message. Press to pause to write down information. When you listen to a phone message, you need to listen for specific information: Who called? When did the …

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1. "Hi, you've reached [your name] at [your company]. I'm unavailable right now — probably helping [type of company] get [X results, e.g. ‘double their leads in 60 days,' ‘hire the best and brightest engineers,' ‘convert 40% more customers.'] Leave your name and number, and we'll discuss how your company can see similar results."

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    7. The Top 10 Best Answering Machine Messages. Now you say something. Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead.

    18. “Thanks for calling [Company name/your name]. We hope you’re enjoying the holiday season. We aren’t available at the moment due to our holiday hours. Leave your name, number and the reason for your call and we’ll get back to you ASAP! Thanks for calling.” Everyone deserves a break. Let your callers know although you might be enjoying one too, that their needs are important.
    7. I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty-dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.

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    A formal voicemail greeting is one with a professional tone. It could be for a business or for personal reasons. Formal voicemail greetings are designed to impart a sense of authenticity. They leave the caller with a sense of trust in your abilities, whatever they may be.

    8.) Benvenuti al Servizio Assistenza della John Doe. Purtroppo, tutte le linee sono occupate al momento. Si prega di lasciare un messaggio dopo il segnale con il vostro nome e numero di telefono. Vi richiameremo al più presto possibile. Vi auguriamo una buona giornata.
    Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.

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    8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back."

    5.) Benvenuti alla John Doe. Potete raggiungerci personalmente dal Lunedì al Venerdì dalle 7am alle 6pm e il Sabato dalle 10am all’1pm. Se volete effettuare un ordine o avete domande, si prega di lasciare il vostro nome, numero cliente e numero di telefono. Vi richiameremo al più presto possibile. Potete anche inviarci una e-mail a: [email protected]. Grazie per aver chiamato – arrivederci.
    You may additionally want to bear in mind that people might be calling you from their cellphones, and a long message can use up someone’s valuable cellphone minutes. Some voicemail systems have the option of pressing a key like the pound key to immediately start recording a message; you may want to consider the funny or long message only if you have this option available to callers. Another point of consideration when recording an answering machine greeting is who is likely to call. If you’re job hunting, for instance, you may want to drop the funny salutation for a while, and use a more standard and businesslike greeting, unless you’re applying for jobs as a comic. Is Amazon actually giving you the best price? This little known plugin reveals the answer. Some answering machines utilize cassette tapes.

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    If you want to leave your name and just a message, press star, press 6, ask for extension 4443, then leave your name and message. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, spin in a circle, press 1 twice, …

    Your voicemail greeting is a prime way for you to differentiate your business and be memorable, and it doesn’t have to be a chore. Anything that breaks up the monotony of corporate greetings will do the trick. For example, you can include a few of the deals you’re currently running or even your mission statement.
    6. You have reached [your business]. All of our representatives are currently busy, but if you leave us a detailed message with your name and number we will return your call in the next two hours. Thank you for calling and have a great day.

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13. “Hi, you’ve reached [company]. We’re available by phone from [hour] to [hour] [time zone] Monday through Friday [optional: and from hour to hour on the weekends]. You can also contact us by going to our website, [URL], and live-chatting or emailing us. If you’d like us to call you back, please leave your name and number after the beep.”

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Many callers will be respectful of your wishes and follow your directives. This is extremely vital for reducing your voicemail volume.

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17. “Happy Holidays from [company name]. Our hours are a little bit different this holiday season. [List hours]. We hope it’s not an emergency, but if so, we’ve got you covered. Contact us at [company email/other support lines] and we’ll get back to you ASAP. For all other inquiries, we’ll contact you when we are back from the holiday – we might be a few pounds heavier but eager to speak with you! Happy Holidays.” Things happen during the holidays, we know. Let your callers know you are still there just in case!

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“Hi! You have reached [your business]. All of our staff are currently busy helping other callers. We understand how valuable your time is, and rather than keeping you on hold, we will make sure to call you back.Be sure to leave us a detailed message with your name and number. We will return your call within two business hours. Thanks!”

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