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Here's the problem with recording elaborate joke messages on your answering machine: Your answering machine will become more popular than the person who owns it. Friends would tell total strangers to call my number and listen to the new goofy message. They would become disappointed if I actually answered the call first. I would have to hang up and let the machine pick up just for other people's entertainment. Dozens of people were finally calling my home phone, but few of them wanted to talk to me personally.

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Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.
Hello, you have reached X (the service provider), the one-stop destination for your pet care needs. Right now, all our staffs are busy attending client calls. You may choose to stay online until they get free or leave your number and details so that we can call you back. Alternatively, try our live chat for immediate needs. .

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"Hi. I'm screening my calls right now because there are some people I don't want to talk to. So, leave a message after the beep and I'll get back to you as long as you're not one of them."
Communicate the same information to a group of people at once. This feature only works with other CenturyLink voicemail users, so you'll need to ask the others in your group if they also have this service.

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1. "Hi, you've reached [your name] at [your company]. I'm unavailable right now — probably helping [type of company] get [X results, e.g. ‘ double their leads in 60 days,' ‘hire the best and brightest engineers,' ‘convert 40% more customers.']
Your call is important to us and we will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your full name, contact details, phone number, and availability after the beep and we will call you back straight away. Thank you!”

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Avoid using ‘please’ more than once, it gets wordy and redundant. The goal is to keep the content as concise as possible, moving callers quickly and seamlessly through the options.

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Happy Independence Day from Yu Orthodontics! We are closed from the 4th thru the 6th in celebration of the 4th of July holiday. Our office will reopen at 8 am on Monday, July 9th. If you have an emergency, please hang up and dial 911. If this is an urgent matter and you cannot wait to speak to the doctor when we when we are open, please call Dr. Yu directly at 555-4010. If you are calling to inquire about services or schedule an appointment, please leave a message, and we will return your call on Monday. Thank you and have a fun, safe holiday!

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    The reason being it can either push your prospects away from you or retain them for longer.

    Voicemail Service Local Voicemail Service Toll Free Voicemail Announcement Only Line Read My Voicemail Question & Answer Line Automated Order-Taking
    These are just a few ideas to get the gears turning. These are simple examples, but don’t be afraid to show a little personality.

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    If you like to keep things simple, opt for a basic greeting. Most voicemail options allow you to record just your name, which lets callers know they’ve reached the right person.

    19. "Hello, you've reached [your name]. I'm currently [exploring Asia, hiking through the jungle in Costa Rica, hanging out on the beach in Bermuda] — or more likely, [recovering from extreme jet lag, googling ‘Are red spiders poisonous,' or looking for SPF 150 sunscreen] and won't be back in the office until [date]. Leave your contact info and reason for calling and I'll get in touch then."
    Weren’t these messages funny and wacky for your machine. Of course, you have to be a bit careful as to what you say and record on your machine. You don’t want to offend anyone or say something that might upset your listeners. So be absolutely sure. And, if you have any more voicemail ideas, do let us know by leaving a comment below. Till then, I’d like to… beep.

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    Hello, this is (your name). I’m sorry but you’ve reached my old number. Call me on (your new number) and I will try to take your call. If you can’t reach me there as well, leave me your name, number, and reason for call. Thank you.

    2. Hello, you have reached the office of [your name]; I will be out of my office starting on [date] and will be returning on [date]. You can call me when I return or leave a brief message. If this is an emergency I can be reached on my cell, which is [your number].
    Website: https://www.voicemail-greetings.com/000-selection-of-voicemail-greetings.html

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    Hello, you have reached the firm of real estate agent X. I am currently in a meeting with a client, but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Kindly leave your name, your reason for calling and your contact number so that I can get back to you at the earliest. If there is any kind of urgency, you can get in touch with me at Y number.

    Hello. You have reached [Name]. I apologize for not being able to answer your call at the moment. However, if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I’ll make sure to contact you when I return.
    Hello! This is [Nick on the West Coast Sales Team at LinkedPhone]. I am currently on vacation until [Friday, April 22nd] with limited access to email. If you require urgent assistance, please contact my lieutenant [Harold Kisp at 415-555-1212 or [email protected]]. Otherwise, please leave a message and I will return your call when I’m back in the office. Thank you and I look forward to chatting!

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When you’ve successfully recorded your best English Voicemail Greeting please write “DONE” in the comments on our Voicemail Greeting Video in Youtube and give yourself a high five! Well done.

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Here are 5 sample scripts for business voicemail greetings that will make you and your company look personable, knowledgeable, and professional. And here are some sample voicemail greeting scripts for doctors, lawyers, and dentists, in case you're not looking for business greetings.

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Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. ...Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. ...Hi. ...Hello! ...A is for academics, B is for beer. ...Hi. ...Hi! ...This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording device. ...Hello, you are talking to a machine. ...

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