“Good afternoon. You have reached the office of [your name]. I will be out of the office beginning on [date] and will be returning on [date]. Please leave a brief message with your contact information, and I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return on [date]. If this is an emergency or you need to speak with someone before I return, please contact [name of colleague/supervisor], [their job title], at [their phone number].”
I have amnesia and can’t come to the phone at the moment. I feel stupid talking to everyone that I don’t know. So why don’t you forget about leaving your original message, and instead tell me my name and something important about myself. Thanks a lot.

The other problem with creating humorous messages is that occasionally someone with actual information will call. Potential employers, current bosses and clergy may not appreciate sitting through a PG-13 outgoing announcement before leaving an important message. Length is another consideration. Many people prefer an answering machine's outgoing message to be as brief and as professional as possible. Unless you own a business where listing hours of operation or contact numbers is important, try not to go past 15 seconds on an outgoing message. Post your comments Please enter the following code: Login: Forgot password? Register:
The bottom line is that a business’s situation is likely to change often and rapidly, each of which need a unique and applicable voicemail greeting to cover the circumstances and timeline. For example, callers shouldn’t reach a business-as-usual voicemail, and therefore expect a return call within the business day, if the subject they’re calling is out on vacation for two weeks. Such a lack of communication is a recipe to lose that caller’s trust and tarnish the brand’s reputation.