6. You have reached [your business]. All of our representatives are currently busy, but if you leave us a detailed message with your name and number we will return your call in the next two hours. Thank you for calling and have a great day.
9. This is Dan Cassidy’s answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I’ve doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI.
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While they are listening to your voice, they are internally deciding whether or not it is worth their time to continue or hang up. Look at your voicemail message as its own short advertisement.
36. Hello. You’ve reached the office of [your name] at [your company]. I will be out of the office from [date] to [date]. Please leave your contact information with a brief message, and I will call you back as soon as I have the chance. If you need to speak with someone urgently, please contact [name of colleague] at [email or phone number]. Thanks for calling.
Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions.
We’re all familiar with this type of voicemail greeting. Simply put, a caller reaches you by dialing your number or extension directly. For an optimal personal voicemail greeting, be clear about who you are, the team you’re on, and when the caller can expect a callback. Unlike company and department voicemail greetings, you may not be able to configure a greeting for open and closed business hours. If that’s the case, use a general voicemail greeting that accommodates both scenarios.
Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you.
10. Escape the Voicemail Box Option. You have reached the voicemail of [person’s name]. If you would like to leave a voicemail, please press 1 and leave your name, number, and a brief message.
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Business professionals are also encouraged to keep their voicemail organized. Delete any messages from the office phone that are no longer necessary after calls are returned, and write down any phone numbers that are needed at the time the message is listened to. If modern voicemail service is utilized, such as that supplied by Voicemail Office, in which voicemail and fax messages are received in a staff member’s email inbox, the individual should write a short explanation in the body of the email if forwarding any voicemail messages to other staff members.
"Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you."
Explain Your Return Call Policy: In your after hours message for the medical office, be sure to state your return call policy for voicemail response. By giving callers an estimate of when they can expect a return call from someone in your office, you can eliminate multiple phone calls from the caller, as well as reduce work for your staff members.
Any time you're checking voicemail from a phone line that is not your home line, you are required to enter your voicemail PIN. Did you forget your PIN? You can reset it.
Website: https://funny-about-money.com/phone-solicitor-discouragement-the-long-winded-voicemail-message/
37. You have reached [your name] at [your company]. Thank you for calling. Please leave your name, number and a message, and I will get right back to you.
Karyn-Ruth Crawley, of Centreville, nominated the following message, which you'll hear on her home machine: "We're sorry, but all of our operators are unusually busy. But if you'll leave your name, number and a brief message, your call will be answered in the order it was received."