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Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

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Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.
16. “Hello, you’ve reached [your name, the office of X company]. The team is currently out of the office, but we’ll be back on [date] stuffed with good food and eager to speak with you. Leave your name, number, and — if you’re so inclined — your favorite [holiday dish, Thanksgiving tradition, etc.]” .

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This service gives you one main mailbox plus three personal extensions so that different household members can receive private messages. Additional fees apply. For information, see the Extension Mailboxes user guide. Retrieve messages from another CenturyLink mailbox
If you need more information about our professional voicemail greetings, contact us now and let’s get things started.

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Save time with Call Return. Press 88 after listening to a message to automatically dial the number of the person who called. (This feature will not work if the caller has Caller ID Blocking.) Reply to or forward messages
Education Details: Custom Voicemail Greetings: Our pre-recorded on hold messages are available in 9 languages spoken by native speakers. We custom produce highest quality voicemail messages, IVR messages, on hold messages and announcements based on your individual scripts in multiple languages. We are looking forward to your call.

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“Hello, you’ve reached the special agent Bond. James Bond. Okay okay, it’s actually [last name]. I’m currently away saving the world on a top-secret mission but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, contact info, number, and availability and I’ll call back as soon as I’m done helping M16. Have a great day. [last name] out!”

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Another great information you can put in your voicemail messages is to inform your prospects when you can reach out to them say the next morning or mid-afternoon and more so that they can be aware of when they can expect a call from you.

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    Education Details: Professional Greetings . When to use a professional greeting: If you don't know the person well, it is best to use Mr., Ms., or Dr. as an appropriate business letter salutation. If you have any doubts about which greeting you should use, err on the side of caution and use the more formal style of address.
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    For small businesses, there are a variety of voicemail service providers you can use that offer different features. From transcription and voice to text to more convenient features of handling multiple phones through one number, availability varies by service. Shared voicemail and call routing is intended for multiple access and directing calls to one or multiple phones. Mobile apps are also available that allow you to check your messages from your phone. The below infographic outlines the current state and trends of voicemails.

    Hello, you have reached the office of Doctor X. I’m on call at the moment, so I’m unable to respond to your call immediately. Please leave your name, reason for calling, and your number and I will return your call as soon as possible, or call my secretary at Y.
    A phone call to your business is often the first encounter your customers and prospects have with your company. If no one is available to take the call, having the best professional voicemail greetings possible is important to leave a great first impression and to ensure that business opportunities don’t slip by.

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    This is not an answering machine–this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.

    Dexcomm is a Louisiana-based corporation that provides answering services to businesses and service agencies across the United States. We have been open since 1954, employ a staff of nearly 100 people, and our average client retention rate is 10+ years.
    35. Hi, you’ve reached the voicemail of [your name] at [your company]. I’m away from my desk, in a meeting or on the other line. Please leave your name, number and a brief message after the tone and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

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    If you’re less than satisfied in your current phone system voicemail greetings, there is probably a decent reason why. We only employ professional voice talents because we want you provide you a highly effective and high quality recording.

    Voicemail #15. Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you. Weren’t these messages funny and wacky for your machine. Of course, you have to be a bit careful as to what you say and record on
    “Good morning. You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information. Oh, and here’s my motivational quote of the day: [read quote].”

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From the Skype for Business desktop app (if you are running Click-2-Run build C2R 8201.1002 or later), select Set Up Voice Mail. Change your Call Answering Rules You can change what options your callers have when they reach the voicemail service; get disconnected, hear your greeting, record a message, choose to be transferred to the number or user you select. Change your prompt language This is the prompt language that is played to callers. For list of supported languages, see Languages for voicemail greetings and messages from Skype for Business. Configure your Out of Office greeting This is the customized greeting message that is played to callers when your status is Out of Office. This option can be activated "Always," when you have an active "Auto Reply" in Outlook, or whenever you have an out-of-office calendar appointment.  Where you can get your voicemail messages from

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3. Voicemail Greetings For Business. You’ve reached (insert company name.) All of our team members are busy at the moment, but someone will return your call within (insert timeframe) if you’ll be so kind as to leave your name, number, and a brief message.

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Karyn-Ruth Crawley, of Centreville, nominated the following message, which you'll hear on her home machine: "We're sorry, but all of our operators are unusually busy. But if you'll leave your name, number and a brief message, your call will be answered in the order it was received."

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