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8. Funny Voicemail Greetings. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work. I'm David's answering machine. What are you? Hi, this is John's answering machine.

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"If you are a burglar, then we're at home cleaning our weapons and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home and it's safe to leave us a message."
Not only did mobile phones make home phones unnecessary for many, but the ability to send and receive text messages or emails on a smart phone made calls themselves feel unnecessary. Even in many workplaces, answering the phone is now either impossible due to nonstop time demands or discouraged by company cultures that prioritize digital .

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Professional voicemail greetings for your business cell phone number It’s a good practice for each of your team members to have their own personal business phone numbers. There are many reasons why they shouldn’t use their personal cell phone number for business , so you’ll want to give them their own phone number through your VoIP
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Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya?
4.) Welcome to John Doe. Personally, you can reach us during our office hours Monday to Thursday from 9am to noon and 2pm to 4pm, and Friday from 9am to noon. You are welcome to tell us your request by mail to [email protected] and we will get back to you as soon as possible - Thank you.

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12. “Hi, you’ve reached [company]. Unfortunately, we’re currently unavailable. But we want to talk to you — so please leave your name and number, as well as your reason for calling, and someone will call back ASAP.”

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Website: https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/professional-voicemail-greeting

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    Over the last 60+ years, Dexcomm has assisted many medical offices and medical receptionists with voicemail setup. Here are four easy steps that we recommend to set up yours:

    Voicemail messages are important, they solve the basic issue of not missing out on any leads.
    Voicemail #15. Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you. Weren’t these messages funny and wacky for your machine. Of course, you have to be a bit careful as to what you say and record on

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    I made this "grouchy voicemail" for whoever is tired of the boring old voicemail your phone service provides. I will have more funny voicemail greetings on

    Website: https://www.marketingmessages.com/media/Sample-Voice-Prompts-For-Healthcare.pdf
    Or Use Them On Your Answer Machine At Home. >>How To Change Your Voicemail Message<< Save one of these FREE mp3 files to your computer, play it through your computer speakers and record it through your mobile to your customisable voicemail service.

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    “Hey! You’ve reached us here at [XYZ company]. All our team is currently out of the office for the holidays. We’ll be back to work on [date] well-fed and therefore eager to speak with you!

    "John, this is Mark from Pinnacle. I've been working with Steve at JKY industries and It's urgent that I talk to you. You can reach me at 123 (pause 2 seconds) 456 (pause 1-2 second) 7890. That number again is 123.....456.....7890." Hangup.
    Thank you for sharing your info. I really appreciate your efforts and I will be waiting for your further post thank you once again.

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    21. Hello, you’ve reached the Sales Department at [X company]. We can’t take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information, and the reason for reaching out, and one of our team members will be in touch within 24 hours.

    From the main menu, select 4 (Mailbox Options), then press 2 (Hands Free and Time Saver Options).
    6.( مرحبا بكم في .JohnDoe بسبب أعمال الصيانة، لا يمكننا الرد على مكالمتكم في الوقت الراهن. يمكنكم إرسال بريد إلكتروني إلى [email protected]. سيقوم موظفونا بالرد على رسالتكم في أقرب وقت ممكن. نرجوا أن تتقبلوا اعتذارنا عن هذا التوقف المؤقت! شكرا لتفهمكم

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If you find that your business voice message is running a bit long, break it down into sections and decide which parts you can cut out to reduce the message’s length.

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“Hello, you’ve reached the special agent Bond. James Bond. Okay okay, it’s actually [last name]. I’m currently away saving the world on a top-secret mission but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, contact info, number, and availability and I’ll call back as soon as I’m done helping M16. Have a great day. [last name] out!”

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Voicemail messages are important, they solve the basic issue of not missing out on any leads.

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You readers didn't disappoint. I asked for the most clever phone answering machine messages in all creation (or at least in all of Beltwayland). I thought these were the best:

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