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You have reached the voice mail box of (your name). If you’re a hot chick/guy, you may leave a message at the tone. If your one of (your name)’s friends, you may also leave a message at the tone. If you’re not hot and not one of (your name)’s friends, call back when you are. Hello. I’m sorry I didn’t answer your call.

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On the other hand, a stellar professional voicemail is more than just a way to ensure callers are heard. It’s actually a gateway to encourage recruiters, clients, connections, venders, and other callers to continue forward with the first step in developing a business relationship, which is them making contact. The power of the right voicemail greeting is the caller actually staying on the line to leave that contact information or gain access to an alternative contact point.
Save the funny voicemail greetings for your home phone, and let us handle your business phone. Since our digital call center is open 24/7/365, you will never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile. .

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It includes two phone handsets and stores up to 17 minutes of messages to accommodate plenty of calls. We also love the VTech CS6729-5 DECT 6.0 Cordless Phone System with Digital Answering Machine because it includes five handsets, stores up to 14 minutes of messages, and allows you to remotely access your messages.
3. Voicemail Greetings For Business. You’ve reached (insert company name.) All of our team members are busy at the moment, but someone will return your call within (insert timeframe) if you’ll be so kind as to leave your name, number, and a brief message.

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Karyn-Ruth Crawley, of Centreville, nominated the following message, which you'll hear on her home machine: "We're sorry, but all of our operators are unusually busy. But if you'll leave your name, number and a brief message, your call will be answered in the order it was received."
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how do i access my optimum home phone voicemail

With that said, we thought it would be a good idea to provide you with a few examples of voicemail greetings. As you read through these, keep in mind that the effectiveness of your voicemail greeting is one-quarter what you say, and three-quarters how you say it.

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To whom it may concern. You’ve tried to reach Wilbur and Ed. We aren’t here at the moment, but if you want, you can leave your contact information at the tone and one of the brood will get to you shortly. Take care, thanks for the call.

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    3. Hi, this is [your name] of [your business]. I’m currently unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message, and I will contact you as soon as possible. Thanks.

    17. “Happy Holidays from [company name]. Our hours are a little bit different this holiday season. [List hours]. We hope it’s not an emergency, but if so, we’ve got you covered. Contact us at [company email/other support lines] and we’ll get back to you ASAP. For all other inquiries, we’ll contact you when we are back from the holiday – we might be a few pounds heavier but eager to speak with you! Happy Holidays.” Things happen during the holidays, we know. Let your callers know you are still there just in case!
    13. “Hi, you’ve reached [company]. We’re available by phone from [hour] to [hour] [time zone] Monday through Friday [optional: and from hour to hour on the weekends]. You can also contact us by going to our website, [URL], and live-chatting or emailing us. If you’d like us to call you back, please leave your name and number after the beep.”

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    Cindy Hubbard and her 17-year-old son, Zach, have resolved the eternal telephone battle between adult and teenager with this message: "Hello, this is Zach's mom. He can't come to the phone right now, but leave a message, and I'll be sure he returns your call. Oh, and by the way, I live here, too."

    These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It’s natural; not everyone has a funny bone inside them. But that doesn’t mean you get stuck with a boring, cliché greeting. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone).
    Always end with appreciation such as saying thank you. Another way you could end the call is to tell him you know he's busy but you'd appreciate a call back. Whichever way you choose to end your voicemail, make sure you smile as you say it. A mouth that is frowning has a different sound than a smiling mouth.

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    When you have new voicemail, the Phone tab in the Skype for Business main window displays the number of your messages. See Contact Card opens the caller's contact card, which lists their phone number, email address, office location, and so on. Open Item in Outlook provides more information about the call.

    A business answering machine greeting is a message recorded on the voicemail or answering machine of a company. Since this message is going to be heard by at least some of your customers, you should be sure to keep the message professional. For the most part, you should not create a message that is silly or funny, but instead provide important and useful information in a way that is professional and fairly fast. You can, however, use the message as a quick opportunity to include a brief statement about a particular service you offer such as “Thank you for calling The House of Pies, home of the world famous zucchini and artichoke pie.”
    Here’s another funny one for those times you really want to lighten the business mood:

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    Or Use Them On Your Answer Machine At Home. >>How To Change Your Voicemail Message<< Save one of these FREE mp3 files to your computer, play it through your computer speakers and record it through your mobile to your customisable voicemail service.

    9. “Hi, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number and a short message, I’ll be sure to call back.”
    "Hi. I'm screening my calls right now because there are some people I don't want to talk to. So, leave a message after the beep and I'll get back to you as long as you're not one of them."

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Good professional voicemail greeting examples. A business named Lorem Ipsum, which sells widgets, wants to leave a brief message that confirms for the listener that they have called the right business. The message would also prompt the caller to provide information needed to return the call, and throws in a nice quick promotional note.

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2. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.

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Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can’t come to the phone right now, so after the tone, please leave your name and number, then talk briefly about your childhood and tell me what comes to mind when you hear the following words: orange… mother… unicorn… penis. I’ll get back to you with my diagnosis as soon as possible.

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4. Vacation Day Voicemail Greeting. If your business is off for a holiday, it's a common courtesy to update your voicemail to acknowledge the closure. Mention the closure in the beginning of the message, convey when your business is reopening, and don't forget to wish the callers a happy holiday if the occasion calls for it.

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