You readers didn't disappoint. I asked for the most clever phone answering machine messages in all creation (or at least in all of Beltwayland). I thought these were the best:
In certain situations, it’s a good idea to let a call go to voicemail. If you’re in a loud area, unable to spend 10-15 minutes talking, or are otherwise distracted, don’t answer. Recruiters who cold-call candidates will understand that you’re simply unavailable – but make sure to return calls in a timely manner. If possible, call back during regular business hours.
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Hi, this is (your name). I’m not available at the moment. Leave me your name, number, and reason for call after the beep. If this can’t wait, call my secretary at (her cell or desk number).
This is a handy feature if you're checking messages away from home. Let's say you're dialing your retrieval number from a neighbor's phone, who also has CenturyLink voicemail. As soon as you hear their voice mail prompts, press * and enter your 10-digit phone number and password to access your mailbox.
Recording voicemail greetings for your business or personal life requires a separate list of priorities, because they are being used for two distinct purposes and will be heard by two very different types of callers. I have a friend with two cell phones - one for work, and one for personal calls - and if you call both lines, you would never know it's the same person.
Standard greeting with phone number: "At the tone, please record your message to [phone number]."
9. OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep.
Standard greeting with your name: "At the tone, please record your message to [your mailbox's name]." Activate and manage the "message waiting" notification
Hello. (pause) Say something!! Aren’t you gonna talk at all? Why aren’t you saying something? Oh, I forgot. I need to say beep…
26. Thank you for calling [your name] at [company name]. Unfortunately, I can’t take your call right now. Please leave your name, number and a message, and I will call you back as soon as I have the opportunity.
"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."
8. Morgan Freeman Shares His Voice for Voicemail Greetings. Morgan Freeman is known for his voice so much that he was asked to play the voice and image of God in Bruce Almighty.
A special high five to Margot Howard for her outstanding research and contributions to this article. We love working with and supporting like-minded entrepreneurs who are passionate about business success strategies. Thank you Margot! ❤️
12.) Benvenuti alla John Doe. Potete contattarci dal Lunedì al Venerdì dalle 8am alle 12.30pm e dall’1pm alle 4.30pm. Al momento non possiamo rispondere personalmente alla vostra chiamata. Si prega di lasciare un messaggio con il vostro nome e numero di telefono e vi richiameremo al più presto possibile. Per casi urgenti, potete raggiungerci al numero 0821 91039-1211. Grazie.
You’ve reached [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings]. We are currently off-duty. Our business hours are [Monday through Saturday, 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time]. Please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call and we’ll get back to you on the next business day. Thank you.
Website: https://beyondthereceptiondesk.wordpress.com/2013/07/19/answer-machine-messages-get-it-right/
Website: https://talkroute.com/12-fun-professional-business-voicemail-greetings/