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"Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you."

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18. “Thanks for calling [Company name/your name]. We hope you’re enjoying the holiday season. We aren’t available at the moment due to our holiday hours. Leave your name, number and the reason for your call and we’ll get back to you ASAP! Thanks for calling.” Everyone deserves a break. Let your callers know although you might be enjoying one too, that their needs are important.
Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya? .

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If you like to keep things simple, opt for a basic greeting. Most voicemail options allow you to record just your name, which lets callers know they’ve reached the right person.
If done tastefully, you can promote your products or services on your voicemail greeting without sounding pushy. In fact, it’s a great way to keep customers up-to-date on company events, sales, and other news. Be sure to keep it short and have fun with it.

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Below are some of the best clean funny answering machine (voicemail) messages! Want to know the best part? You can try using them in your answering machine or voice mailbox life.
After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. I’ll get back to you as soon as it’s safe for you to come out of hiding.

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Keep in mind that to enjoy the full benefits of your professional greeting system, you must routinely check and delete messages. If your voicemail fills up, you won’t be able to receive new messages, meaning your customers will become frustrated.

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Telephone Answering Services A live operator available 24 hours a day to answer phones, take messages, and transfer calls. Call Center Services Inbound call center services delivered at scale for growing businesses. 24-7 availability. Perfect for domestic and global companies. Dedicated Call Center

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    What happens here is when you apologize and sound genuine in your tone, your prospects would understand and leave their contact details for you to follow with them.

    Want more sales templates? Let our automated software simplify your sales process. Schedule a LIVE Demo of our lead management software and turn more leads into customers with less work!
    If you find that your business voice message is running a bit long, break it down into sections and decide which parts you can cut out to reduce the message’s length.

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    For a medical office, call types may include billing, emergencies, appointments, cancellations, etc. 2. Determine How To Best Route Calls The best method of routing your medical office calls will depend on your office size and budget. If you have a small staff, setting up a standard voicemail greeting system may be a more practical approach. For a larger health organization with multiple departments, it makes more sense to route calls to their intended destinations by using an auto attendant. For example, “If you have a question about billing, press 1. If you’d like to schedule an appointment, press 2. If this is a medical emergency, press 0 for an operator.” If you want every caller or patient to experience a professional and compassionate call, you may consider working with a medical office answering service. You can forward calls to an answering service after business hours, on holidays, during overflow, or any other time you may need help answering calls. 3. Draft A Script

    Here’s another funny one for those times you really want to lighten the business mood:
    Friendly Voicemail Greeting Example. Hello, this is [your name] at [X company]. I am currently unavailable. My office hours are Monday through Friday, from 9 am to 5 pm. Please leave me a message with your name and phone number and I’ll get back to you within [one, two, three] business day[s]. Have a wonderful day.

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    The script is relatively similar, but the doctor is including a good reason for not being available, so patients don’t feel like they’re being ignored. He’s also left another avenue for patients to get in touch if they need some urgent help.

    -Hey! Sorry I missed your call. If you’re a telemarketer, then I’m definitely not sorry. If you’re not a telemarketer, then I’ll return your call as soon as possible.
    Education Details: Business Voicemail Greetings: Top 5 Sample Scripts. By Nate Rand. Business voicemail greetings are underrated. When your customers call your phone system after hours or when your business is closed, they hear your voicemail recording. The voicemail greeting they receive is another opportunity for your company to make a great impression instead

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    When someone reaches your voicemail, it’s important that you help them confirm that they have reached the right person by providing all of the relevant information that they will need. Who have they reached? Did they contact the right person and the right business? Should they leave a message? When will you get back to them? Is there a better time for them to call?

    Your voicemail greeting is a prime way for you to differentiate your business and be memorable, and it doesn’t have to be a chore. Anything that breaks up the monotony of corporate greetings will do the trick. For example, you can include a few of the deals you’re currently running or even your mission statement.
    You might also consider giving them the option to skip your voicemail message completely by pressing another key (again, check with IT). You also want to make callers aware what you will return their call, instead of telling them that you will try to return their call--and let them know when you are likely to do it, if possible. If necessary, provide additional or emergency information in your voicemail greetings. My dentist, for example, lists his cell phone number for emergencies.

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“Good afternoon. You have reached the office of [your name]. I will be out of the office beginning on [date] and will be returning on [date]. Please leave a brief message with your contact information, and I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return on [date]. If this is an emergency or you need to speak with someone before I return, please contact [name of colleague/supervisor], [their job title], at [their phone number].”

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When recording, choose a quiet area, speak clearly, and use your full name (first and last).

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Voicemail Normal. Saw Leave A Voicemai. Japan Girl Voicemail. Greetings. Mig phone greeting. Funny Vmail Greet. Elmer Fudd Greeting. Silence Of The Lambs. Leave Your Message.

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