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You readers didn't disappoint. I asked for the most clever phone answering machine messages in all creation (or at least in all of Beltwayland). I thought these were the best:

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Hello. Thank you for contacting [Business Name]. Unfortunately, we are not currently available at the moment. Our regular office hours are Monday through Friday, 8 am to 4 pm, closed during the weekend. Please leave a message along with your name and number, and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
Departments and teams are typically organized by function – customer service, tech support, sales, billing questions, etc. When a team is busy handling other calls, encourage your callers to leave a message and reassure them that you will get back to them within a reasonable time frame. It’s important that you actually follow through to avoid upsetting your callers. .

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Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, [insert office name] continues to operate remotely during our regular business hours (8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday to Friday).
This free voicemail audio clip is to help with verbiage or as using for your own voicemail response. Looking for a voicemail greeting to use instead of your

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From the main menu, press 5 (Leave this mailbox and log on as another subscriber.)
If you’re less than satisfied in your current phone system voicemail greetings, there is probably a decent reason why. We only employ professional voice talents because we want you provide you a highly effective and high quality recording.

funny answering machine messages you can use

Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY — Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 years ago, but we know he’s still out there somewhere. So . . . leave your name and number and tell us where *YOU* saw Elvis!

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You’ve reached the (name) family. We can’t answer your call right now. So why don’t you leave your name, age, sex, height, weight, phone number, a short message, your social security number, credit card number, how many kids you have, your mother’s maiden name, along with the date and time you called us. And if you’ve survived this message and are still listening, your message better be important.

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    Call your home phone number. Depending on your location, you can press #, * or 2 to interrupt the greeting, and then enter your PIN. Follow the prompts to listen to your messages.

    11.) Bienvenue chez John Doe, malheureusement, vous nous appelez en dehors des heures de bureau, ou nous ne pouvons pas prendre votre appel en ce moment. Si vous voulez nous laisser un message, envoyez-nous un email à [email protected] - Nous vous contacterons dès que possible. Pour plus d'informations sur nous, visitez notre site Web www.johndoe.de. Un grand merci pour votre appel.
    Any time you're checking voicemail from a phone line that is not your home line, you are required to enter your voicemail PIN. Did you forget your PIN? You can reset it.

  • funny answering machine messages for cell phones

    Bluetooth Connect to Cell technology on the VTech IS8151-5 DECT 6.0 Expandable Cordless Phone lets you receive cell and/or landline calls from one home phone system. With a touch of a button, enjoy the high-tech benefits your smart phone offers. See all Cordless …

    These business voicemail greetings will do the trick. 10. "Hello, you've reached [X company]. We can't take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information, and reason for reaching out, and one of our team members will be in …
    1. Personal Business Voicemail Greetings. Hello! You’ve reached (insert company name.) This is (insert name) in the (insert department.) My apologizes for not being available to take your call, but I’m on the line helping another customer (insert business’s most attractive result or purpose point.)

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    Your phone system can be a powerful marketing tool for your business, and that includes your voicemail greeting. If you want to utilize this opportunity to throw in a quick humblebrag and keep callers informed of your awards and accolades, there are a few best practices, you should follow. First, keep the self-promotion brief and appropriately placed within your voicemail message. Don’t promote yourself and your products/services in the same greeting, and finally, only include current achievements in your business voicemail greeting.

    Ideal for business PBX voicemail messages and after-hours Voice 2 Email service. Record custom messages to cover public holidays and temporary office closures.
    5. Be Brief. The best after hours greetings are brief, direct, and punctual. Do not waste the customer's time and give them a reason to hang up by adding in unnecessary details.

  • free funny answering machine messages

    "Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you."

    Tired of dull and dreary productivity apps? Flow is simple, beautiful, and delightful.
    3. Available Agents Greeting. What callers hear when they are routed to an available agent. Sample Scripts: “Please hold while you are connected to the next available agent.”

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http://www.ezrasvoice.com/ Cell Phone Voicemail Greetings can easily be created using this blueprint. While all Cell Phone Voicemail Greetings will be uniq

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Audio files are optimized and delivered to you for the highest quality phone system playback.

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10. Escape the Voicemail Box Option. You have reached the voicemail of [person’s name]. If you would like to leave a voicemail, please press 1 and leave your name, number, and a brief message.

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Hello… my name is (your name)’s refrigerator. He/she isn’t home right now to take your call. To leave him/her a message, speak very slowly so I can stick the message with the help of these refrigerator magnets.

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