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25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day."

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"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."
3. Funny Examples of Voicemail Messages. These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, please leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future. .

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This is not an answering machine–this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.
Funny Answering Machine Messages Sample Messages Funny answering machine messages are basically messages that are recorded in an answering machine and are intended to deliver a humorous punch to the Sample Funny Answering Machine Messages: " You have reached the voicemail of God! Now try and humor me or stop wasting my time!

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14. “Thanks for giving us a call! We promise it’s never a bad time for [company name], but you’ve reached us after-hours. Please leave us your name, number and the best time to reach you and we’ll give you a call when we are open.” Let’s face it, you’re not always open. Yet that doesn’t mean you don’t want to help your caller. Let them know you’ll call them right back when you’re open again.
To use Slydial, dial 267-SLYDIAL (267-759-3425). When prompted, enter the US mobile phone number for the person you are trying to call. Once the service connects you, leave your voicemail, and then just hang up.

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There is no definitive answer here, but you should include one of the two at the beginning of your message based on what makes the most sense.

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Keep it Brief. Time is money in business, so if your voicemail is long, chances are the caller will simply disengage before the cue to leave a message even sounds. Keep your voicemail short. The most should be around 30 seconds, and even that’s pressing it. We’ve grown into a country where our attention span can last only about 10 seconds in some cases, so keep it short, brief and to the point. Persuade and Engage the Caller. If someone calls your business, they already have an intention. It’s the quality of your voicemail that plays a factor if they consider you a company they’d like to deal with. This is your chance to motivate someone to engage in a meaningful conversation with you. If your voicemail is shoddy, chances are they’ll hang up, or lose motivation to continue the call. In other words, your voice mail must engage and entice someone to the point that they care enough to leave you a message.

  • creative voicemail

    Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings!]. You’ve reached us outside of business hours. Please select from one of the following options: [for business hours press 1; to leave a message press 2; if this is an emergency, press 0 to be directed to our 24-hour customer success team.] We are grateful for your call and we look forward to speaking with you soon!

    Save time with Call Return. Press 88 after listening to a message to automatically dial the number of the person who called. (This feature will not work if the caller has Caller ID Blocking.) Reply to or forward messages
    Save the funny voicemail greetings for your home phone, and let us handle your business phone. Since our digital call center is open 24/7/365, you will never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile.

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    To set up your voicemail, call the access number from your welcome letter or try #55, *68, or *98. If you don't have a welcome letter, contact us to get your access number.

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    5. Be Brief. The best after hours greetings are brief, direct, and punctual. Do not waste the customer's time and give them a reason to hang up by adding in unnecessary details.

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    Hello! Thanks for calling [LinkedPhone. We’re currently tied up assisting other entrepreneurs & small businesses at the moment]. But please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call and we will get back to you as soon as possible. We look forward to working with you. Thank you.

    5. Be Brief. The best after hours greetings are brief, direct, and punctual. Do not waste the customer's time and give them a reason to hang up by adding in unnecessary details.
    10. Escape the Voicemail Box Option. You have reached the voicemail of [person’s name]. If you would like to leave a voicemail, please press 1 and leave your name, number, and a brief message.

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    Hi, thanks for calling the residence of the Jennings Family. As you can tell, no one’s home to answer your call, but just leave your name, number and message and we’ll get back as soon as we can. Thanks

    Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.
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answering machine greetings for business sample

Selection of pre-recorded phone greetings and on hold messages: In order to select your desired phone message, please follow steps 1,2 and 3 in order . Our pre-recorded message packages are available in all common audio formats (mp3 / wave / alaw / ulaw / 16bit / 18bit).

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Most households have automated machine greetings that sound very monotonous when someone calls. No originality, no flare, and absolutely no vigor; doesn’t really make things better for the callers. Nonetheless, you don’t have to be stuck with such boring and lifeless greetings. You can definitely convert your home, office, or cell phone greetings that show a bit of your unique personality. Depending on what type of calls come in and where you’re receiving them, you too can have fun selecting serious, unique, interesting, or funny voicemail greetings. The following greetings will help you decide or inspire you into selecting one (or more) voice mail for yourself.

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Creating a voicemail greeting might not be fun, but with the scripts I’ve shared, you should have an easier time. No need to practice time and time again — simply plug in your name, company title, and other details, then read it out loud to your phone’s voicemail greeting recorder. With a professional greeting, you’ll continue nurturing prospects even if you don’t pick up the phone.

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A voice mailbox is typically associated with a telephone number. When the number is called, and the line is busy or not answered, the caller hears an outgoing Greeting recorded by you and is given instructions for leaving a message.

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