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3. Funny Examples of Voicemail Messages. These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, please leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future.

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Hi there! You’ve reached the domicile of Blackmore Enterprises [Horn Honk]. We’re sorry to have missed your call, but there’s only so many hours in the day where one has the chance to gut a zombie, or nail a corpse to a tree. As such, please leave your name, contact information, and message, and we’ll try to get back to you as soon as we can. Thanks much for your call. Leave your personal name or business name Say you’re sorry you missed the call Ask them to leave their contact information and message Thank them for their call
You might call this one Current Events Run Wild: "Hey, this is Sally. I can't come to the phone right now. Kato and I are at McDonald's." .

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The following templates and text ideas can be used for almost any kind of voicemail greeting. You can switch the language of the text blocks by pressing the tab button.
2. “Hi! We’re glad you called [company name]. We’re happy to help but we are either on the line with another client or on the go! Please let us know your name, number, and reason for your call today. As soon as we become available, we will call you right back. Thanks!” Ask your callers to leave a short message so you can determine when to return their call.

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The difference between writing a script and writing for print is that scripts must be written for the ear and written for effective delivery by voice talent. It must be written in a conversational tone. When you create a script that’s listenable, your callers will better understand your business.
"You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you."

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4. Product-Focused. Thanks for calling [Company Name].For more information about our products, press 1. If you have troubleshooting questions, press 2. For billing questions, press 3.

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Any business answering machine greeting you use should also be customized and personal for your needs. If you have an emergency service, that a caller can activate through the press of a button for faster response, then you should indicate this in the message. It can also be helpful to remind callers of the information they need to provide in their message, such as their name, contact information, and reason for calling. You should also thank the caller for his or her call at the end of your message and indicate that you plan on returning the call as soon as possible. You might also Like Reminiscence February 8, 2014

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    We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and Master Card, Visa, or American Express account number and we’ll get back to, pending credit approval.

    5. Road side cafe; you kill them and we’ll cook them. Leave your order and we’ll get back.
    Funny Answering Machine Messages Sample Messages Funny answering machine messages are basically messages that are recorded in an answering machine and are intended to deliver a humorous punch to the Sample Funny Answering Machine Messages: " You have reached the voicemail of God! Now try and humor me or stop wasting my time!

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    88 Creative Answering Machine Messages. 1. Hi. Now you say something. 2. Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep. 3. You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time.

    The biggest barrier is actually getting them to leave the voicemail in the first place. Don’t get in your own way by recording a long, drawn-out voicemail greeting that might do more to convince them to hang up than actually leave a message.
    Save the funny voicemail greetings for your home phone, and let us handle your business phone. Since our digital call center is open 24/7/365, you will never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile.

  • how to make a professional sounding voicemail

    It makes sense to have an after-hours / weekend voicemail greeting for important teams at your business so that your clients feel confident that they will be taken care of. You may also suggest alternate resources like a help forum, knowledge base, or online chat to support customers while closed, if available.

    Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.
    If you don’t have time to practice, writing down the greeting before recording it – and then reading it aloud from the paper – may help you stay focused on the correct wording. Basic Voicemail Message Examples: 1. Share basic information: “Hello! You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name], [your job title]. I’m currently either

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    A business answering machine greeting is a message recorded on the voicemail or answering machine of a company. Since this message is going to be heard by at least some of your customers, you should be sure to keep the message professional. For the most part, you should not create a message that is silly or funny, but instead provide important and useful information in a way that is professional and fairly fast. You can, however, use the message as a quick opportunity to include a brief statement about a particular service you offer such as “Thank you for calling The House of Pies, home of the world famous zucchini and artichoke pie.”

    Prepare for alpha test of Beep Software revision 1.05. Counting down to test: 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…
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Thank you for your message. I am away from the office leading a workshop Dec. 1–4. I will be checking email throughout the day and will try to respond to messages promptly (please flag urgent messages as high importance). However, if you need immediate assistance, please contact Johnny Woo at [email protected] or 465-555-1098.

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1. Personal Business Voicemail Greeting. Your personal voicemail greeting should be brief and to the point. State your name and your availability, project a welcoming aura, and ask the caller for whatever information you need from them.

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A general voicemail greeting is what callers will be greeted with if you are unable to answer the phone at work. It is the everyday greeting, used as the default, unless you have set up a temporary greeting, such as an away message while you're on vacation, or a special message during a holiday.

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In Australian English it’s pronounced with the vowel /a:/ like in ‘part’. Problems arise when people use the /ʌ/ vowel (like in ‘up’) instead of /æ/ or /a:/. If you do this is will sound like the worst swear word in English. Many non-native speakers often pronounce the vowel /æ/ more like /ʌ/ because they don’t have a vowel like /æ/ in their first language. Many speakers of European languages will do this (Spanish speakers and Italian speakers) and also speakers of Japanese and Korean. This problem with /æ/ also means that if you say the word ‘back’ in your voicemail greeting sample, you are likely to pronounce it more like ‘buck’. remember to pronounce word endings in English. Check you aren’t dropping any endings off or mispronouncing them.

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