And this one (from Brad Lund, of Baltimore) made me giggle loudest and longest: "This is the Lund residence. The answering machine is on vacation. This is the refrigerator speaking. State your message slowly and clearly. I'll write it down and stick it to myself with one of those little magnets."
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-Hi, you’ve reached _____________. Please leave a message after my kid stops (awkward moment of silence) owwwwwwwwwww that hurt!… continuing… after my kid stops hitting me in the back with his hockey stick! BEEP
Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don’t worry,
.
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Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya?
Jason is PCMag's how to content generator. He believes tech corporations are bad, but you might as well know how to use technology in everyday life. He is a Mac owner, Android user, dark mode advocate, and tech bargain hunter. Before joining PCMag, Jason was a technical writer, copywriter, and all-around freelancer covering baseball, comics, and more at various outlets. When not writing and editing, he is either reading comic books, playing his Nintendo Switch, hanging out with his wife and two cats, or some combination of the three. Read the latest from Jason Cohen How to Use Widgets in Windows 11 How to Enable Dark Mode on Your Browser Windows 11's Taskbar Puts App Icons Front and Center: Here's How to Customize It These Websites Suffered the Most Outages Over the Past Year How to Use Bluetooth Headphones With the Nintendo Switch More from Jason Cohen facebook twitter flipboard google instagram pinterest
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5. Emergency Situation Voicemail Greeting. In the case that your business is closed due to an emergency, it's only worth it to go into detail if the problem is affecting everyone in the area.
2.) Welcome to John Doe. Unfortunately you are calling us outside our normal business hours. Personally you can reach us Monday to Friday from 8am 6pm and Saturday from 9am to 4pm. Please leave a message, or send us an email to: [email protected]. We will contact you as soon as possible - Thank you.
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2. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.
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This is the type of message you should aim for when you are recording an answering machine greeting at your place of business. Some people do need to leave other information for business salutations, such as office hours, and they may leave special messages when they’re on vacation. Name of the business, or your name can be important too, since people may want to be sure they’ve reached the right person or business. Answering machine greetings should be pleasant in tone.
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Education Details: Business Voicemail Greeting Examples. Coming up with a good business voicemail greeting can be trickier than coming up with a personal voicemail greeting. Take some cues from the below to ensure callers leave a voicemail message after listening to your greeting. Additionally, consider writing a voicemail script to ensure you don’t leave out church answering machine greetings
Hi! I told you never to call me at this number. But since you did, I left the knife on your back porch…Check to see I got all the blood off. Don’t forget to leave a message, and we’ll talk about the…plan.
-Roses are red booger’s are green please leave your message on this stupid machine. Readers also Love to Read:100+ Affirmations for Long Distance Relationship 59+ Best Goodbye Messages to Colleagues 101+ Catchy Goodbye Slogans and Quotes 48+ Best Wedding Puns and Funny Quotes “Learn to Stress Less” 68+ Inspiring Quotes
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When I was in my 20s, I had an answering machine with a 30 second outgoing message tape. I thought it would be fun to come up with all sorts of cute or funny messages for my friends to hear just before the beep. It got pretty elaborate sometimes, with celebrity impersonations and movie spoofs and other things. I didn't usually get many important phone calls anyway, so I didn't see any harm in being funny for the few people who did call.
1. Call Center Departments. Hello and thank you for calling, [Company Name], where [state your short company slogan]. If you know the extension of the party you are trying to reach, you may dial it at any time.
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5. Hello. I’m home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.
-Roses are red booger’s are green please leave your message on this stupid machine. Readers also Love to Read:100+ Affirmations for Long Distance Relationship 59+ Best Goodbye Messages to Colleagues 101+ Catchy Goodbye Slogans and Quotes 48+ Best Wedding Puns and Funny Quotes “Learn to Stress Less” 68+ Inspiring Quotes
Education Details: The following voicemail greeting examples range from the brief and simple to the more detailed. You should choose the one that best suits your job and responsibilities as well as your personality. Before recording your message, you should also make sure to adhere to the basic elements of good voicemail greetings. basic elements of good
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Messaging services including Facebook Messenger, Telegram, and WhatsApp all support voice messaging. Generally, you send a voice message through one of these apps by opening a conversation and holding down the microphone button. You then let go to send the message or swipe the screen to delete.
Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.
Hello, you have reached the office of Doctor X. I’m on call at the moment, so I’m unable to respond to your call immediately. Please leave your name, reason for calling, and your number and I will return your call as soon as possible, or call my secretary at Y.
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Voicemail #15. Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you. Weren’t these messages funny and wacky for your machine. Of course, you have to be a bit careful as to what you say and record on
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On a psychiatrist's phone: "Please emit verbal response at the auditory stimulus."
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8. Morgan Freeman Shares His Voice for Voicemail Greetings. Morgan Freeman is known for his voice so much that he was asked to play the voice and image of God in Bruce Almighty.
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(From my Japanese friend in Toronto) He-lo! This is Sa-to. If you leave message, I call you soon. If you leave *sexy* message, I call sooner!
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4. 21 Professional Voicemail Greeting Examples. It's always a good idea to let callers know exactly when their calls may be returned and to list the operating hours.
Sound benign and businesslike? That's the whole idea. As Karyn-Ruth explains it, "Bill collectors, the IRS, sales personnel, obscene callers and other obnoxious people think they have reached a business, and therefore the wrong number, and hang up."
For example, the traditional Irish Christian Blessing "May God grant you many years" makes a lovely message for callers to hear. 4 Funny Voice Mail To jazz up your voice mail and put a bit of theater into it, you can take the quote from Samuel; "The LORD thundered from heaven; the voice of the Most High resounded."
Tone - select the right tone for your business brand. If your target market are young millennials, then the script would most likely include some slang words, be quite laid back and the script would be recorded in an energetic tone. If you primarily service the business market, then the script would be more articulate and recorded with a more professional tone.
› Url: https://www.messagingservice.com/resources/best-business-voicemail-greetings/ Go Now
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I personally don't like voicemail. I don't check messages because my phone identifies missed calls. I know who these people are and why they are calling. I don't want to spend (waste)time hearing nothing of importance. I have left messages saying
The basic rule of thumb is that callers should hear one of two things when they first connect with your voicemail — either an apology for not being able to answer the call or a “thank you” for having called. You can do both if you prefer, but keep it short and to the point.
The standard default house phone voicemail or answering machine sound effectFree Download: https://uptona.com/wW2GLPQ6Subscribe for more Sounds!http://bit.ly
16. “Hello, you’ve reached [your name, the office of X company]. The team is currently out of the office, but we’ll be back on [date] stuffed with good food and eager to speak with you. Leave your name, number, and — if you’re so inclined — your favorite [holiday dish, Thanksgiving tradition, etc.]”
You can definitely convert your home, office, or cell phone greetings that show a bit of your unique personality. Depending on what type of calls come in and where you’re receiving them, you too can have fun selecting serious, unique, interesting, or funny voicemail greetings.
7. Direct Customers to Your Account Login Page. Thank you for calling [Company Name]. Our offices are currently closed for the day. Standard office hours are Monday to Friday, 8 AM to 8 PM Eastern Time.
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4. Waiting Message. What callers hear when they enter the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: “All of our agents are currently busy. Please hold and we will answer your call as soon as possible.”
4.) Bienvenido/a a John Doe. Nos puede contactar personalmente durante nuestro horario de oficina de lunes a jueves de 9:00h a 12:00h y de 14:00h a 16:00h. Asimismo, nos puede enviar un correo electrónico a [email protected] y le contestaremos lo antes posible. Gracias.
29. Hi, you’ve reached [your name] at [your company]. Please send me an email at [email address] if this is urgent, and I’ll get in contact with you as soon as possible. If this is not urgent, please leave me a brief message about the reason you are calling with your contact information and I’ll get back to you in the next 24 hours. Have a great day.
You have reached the voice mail box of (your name). If you’re a hot chick/guy, you may leave a message at the tone. If your one of (your name)’s friends, you may also leave a message at the tone. If you’re not hot and not one of (your name)’s friends, call back when you are. Hello. I’m sorry I didn’t answer your call.
36. Hello. You’ve reached the office of [your name] at [your company]. I will be out of the office from [date] to [date]. Please leave your contact information with a brief message, and I will call you back as soon as I have the chance. If you need to speak with someone urgently, please contact [name of colleague] at [email or phone number]. Thanks for calling.
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1. HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA.
20 Creative and Funny Voicemail Greetings to Try Today. Hello. I’m available right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. Hi, this is [ your name ]. If you’re part of the problem, hang up now. If …
Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions.
Hello, it’s obvious you have bad timing, because nobody is home. Please leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message in a voice similar to mine, and your call will be returned as soon as humanly possible.
This is the message that is used in personal physical answering machines and in the network answering machines offered by telephone operators. ORDER YOUR MESSAGES This is the voicemail of the lawyer John Smith, the lawyer can not answer at the moment, leave a message after the tone and you’ll be called back as soon as possible.
Selection of pre-recorded phone greetings and on hold messages: In order to select your desired phone message, please follow steps 1,2 and 3 in order . Our pre-recorded message packages are available in all common audio formats (mp3 / wave / alaw / ulaw / 16bit / 18bit).
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When on vacation, provide your callers with a return date and a back-up contact person to accommodate emergencies. This prevents you from potentially damaging a valued relationship while you enjoy some time off.
Hello… pause. Hello… long pause. Who is this? long pause again Is anyone on the line?…long pause and beep sound.
Say that your prospects want to speak to the sales department and so when they realize that they have reached the right department and hear the voicemail messages, they will be compelled to leave their contact details so that the sales team can reach out to them later. They will be relieved.
6. Prove your attentiveness to voicemail: “Good morning. You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information.
8.) Herzlich Willkommen in der Service Abteilung der Mustermann GmbH. Leider sind im Augenblick alle Leitungen belegt. Bitte hinterlassen Sie nach dem Signalton eine Nachricht mit Ihrem Namen und Ihrer Telefonnummer. Wir rufen Sie baldmöglichst zurück. Wir wünschen Ihnen einen schönen Tag.
"Hi.I am probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you."
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Hey, who’s this? I’d actually pick up, but my phone is staring at me. OMG! I just saw it wink!
Hi, you’ve reached (your name) office. Either I’m away from the desk or on another line. Please leave me a brief message with your name and contact number so I can call you back. If this is an emergency, call me on (your cell phone number).
12.) Benvenuti alla John Doe. Potete contattarci dal Lunedì al Venerdì dalle 8am alle 12.30pm e dall’1pm alle 4.30pm. Al momento non possiamo rispondere personalmente alla vostra chiamata. Si prega di lasciare un messaggio con il vostro nome e numero di telefono e vi richiameremo al più presto possibile. Per casi urgenti, potete raggiungerci al numero 0821 91039-1211. Grazie.
3. Voicemail Greetings For Business. You’ve reached (insert company name.) All of our team members are busy at the moment, but someone will return your call within (insert timeframe) if you’ll be so kind as to leave your name, number, and a brief message.
Home » Lists » 21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages
2. Interactive Voice Response (IVR) Greeting. The greeting callers hear when they enter your IVR. Sample Scripts: “For English press 1. Para Español presione el número 2.”
