Hi, you have reached (names) voicemail. If you want money or to sell us something, we a) gave at the office, b) already have it, or c) don’t want it. If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. I don’t know who you are, and I don’t know what you want.
Here’s another funny one for those times you really want to lighten the business mood:
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There’s nothing more crucial to your business than the image you create to your customers, community, and your prospects. With a lot of fly by night and home based businesses today, it is more crucial than ever to show your business company in right light and to tell those that make business with you that you’re a trustworthy and credible entity.
I am not in the office today; I may not be in tomorrow. I may be in to work sooner, if you gave me your car to borrow.
Hi! John’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
The thing with voicemail is it can be really handy when it comes to catering to your prospects when you are not available after work hours.
20 Creative and Funny Voicemail Greetings to Try Today. Hello. I’m available right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. Hi, this is [ your name ]. If you’re part of the problem, hang up now. If you’re part of the solution, leave a message. Hi.
36. Hello. You’ve reached the office of [your name] at [your company]. I will be out of the office from [date] to [date]. Please leave your contact information with a brief message, and I will call you back as soon as I have the chance. If you need to speak with someone urgently, please contact [name of colleague] at [email or phone number]. Thanks for calling.
And this one (from Brad Lund, of Baltimore) made me giggle loudest and longest: "This is the Lund residence. The answering machine is on vacation. This is the refrigerator speaking. State your message slowly and clearly. I'll write it down and stick it to myself with one of those little magnets."
3. Hi. I’m probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
By presenting a clear, welcoming message containing relevant information about your business, you are showing callers that you value their time. If your recording is vague, confusing, or drags on, customers will lose interest and hang up the phone instead of leaving a voicemail message.
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12.) Welcome to JohnDoe. You can reach us Monday to Friday from 8am to 12.30pm and 1pm to 4.30 pm. We can not take your call personally at the moment. Please leave a message with your name and phone number and we will call you back as soon as possible. In urgent cases you can reach us on the number 0821 91039- 1211. Many thanks.
In the case that your business is closed due to an emergency, it's only worth it to go into detail if the problem is affecting everyone in the area. Otherwise, stick to your Company Wide Voicemail Greeting, but remove the stated hours and tell callers that you're currently closed. Thank you for calling Cutlass Technology. Our store is currently closed. Please leave your name and phone number so that someone from our team can follow up with you. For more information, please visit www.cutlasstechnology.com
Hi! John’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
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4.) Welcome to John Doe. Personally, you can reach us during our office hours Monday to Thursday from 9am to noon and 2pm to 4pm, and Friday from 9am to noon. You are welcome to tell us your request by mail to [email protected] and we will get back to you as soon as possible - Thank you.